Dennis Cole credited as playing...
Johnny Reach
- J.J. Foote: Them tarnation gas buggies are an abomination to the Lord. Yea, verily, the love a man beareth for his horse ain't never gonna be replaced by no bucket of bolts! Noisy, smelly, new-fangled contraption. You expect to leave that stack of smokin' scrap iron here to offend the noses of honest horses?
- Johnny Reach: Oh, yes sir - and we expect you to guard it tenderly with loving care.
- J.J. Foote: Me? Them things is against nature and all I stand for.
- J.J. Foote: Yea, verily, thus they provoked him to anger with their inventions and a plague broke in upon them - Psalms 106, Verse 29.
- Hank Bracket: The chariots shall rage in the streets, they shall jostle one against another in the broad way and they shall seem like torches and they will run like lightning - Nahum 2, Verse 4.
- J.J. Foote: Hey, you know your scriptures!
- Johnny Reach: If thou canst not lick 'em, join 'em. Uh, Johnny Reach, 1914.
- Hank Bracket: You know, my partner's an old hand at these necktie parties.
- Miss Baker: Oh?
- Hank Bracket: No, really. The first one I attended, he was the guest of honor. That's where I found him. I just plucked him out of a cottonwood tree... and he wasn't very ripe either.
- Johnny Reach: I'd be swingin' there yet if old Hank hadn't happened by... and spoke up from the other end of a double-stacked blowgun.
- Hank Bracket: If you're thinkin' he was brought up in a barn, ma'am, it was nothin' that fancy. It was a wickiup.
- Miss Baker: You mean an Indian dwelling?
- Hank Bracket: He's not even quite civilized yet.
- Miss Baker: Well, you don't look like a savage.
- Johnny Reach: Oh, I'm tame. Family came out of Kansas. My stepmother raised me - she was pureblooded Chiricahua.
- Miss Baker: Oh, you lived with her.
- Johnny Reach: Her people, yes ma'am, after Pa passed away. Still can't sit horse with a saddle on it or sleep on a bed. Sorry.
- [last lines]
- Hank Bracket: What kept ya?
- Johnny Reach: Oh, business. I got your five dollars back from Miss Baker.
- Hank Bracket: How'd you do that?
- Johnny Reach: Oh, ah, she bet me she chould kiss me without touching.
- Hank Bracket: She bet you that?
- Johnny Reach: Yeah. Born loser... but an awful good sport!