Do Not Fold, Spindle or Mutilate

Never having seen this made-for-TV movie at its 1971 release, I assumed with these four talented thespians between the ages of 60 (Sylvia Sidney) and 70 (Helen Hayes), that it was purely a comedy - and that's how it opened.

I particularly got a kick out of Shelby's (Mildred Natwick's) comment about her husband hating computers and saying "they were invented by the Democrats to destroy the Republican Party." Wow, I certainly didn't see THAT remark coming.

However, being privy to Vince Edward's character's "mindspeak" narrative got to be distracting and irritating to the point of muting. His character seemed to be in an entirely different movie from the other four veterans!

Overall, I enjoyed these four Manhattan-drinking pros immensely, especially Hayes and Natwick. Loy was not her usual Nora Charles self but rather serious as Hayes' more practical sister. And Sidney with her hat pin was a hoot. I wonder how many people will remember her in two of her later roles in Beetlejuice and Mars Attacks. It would have been a joy to see the four reunite in more movies. Rest in peace, ladies! God bless!

This film led to The Snoop sisters, a short lived TV series in which two elderly ladies get caught up in murders as twin Miss Marples.

The story is about four elderly ladies in southern California, all pretty well off, all played by easily recognizable actresses of Hollywood's Golden age. They eat, shop, and play bridge together, but they are also rather bored. So they decide to fill out a form for a computer dating service, making up the girl who is trying to date - 5'7, blonde, blue eyed, 125 pounds, 23. They give her a made up name, making sure nobody else who has that name is in the telephone book, and also indicate she has no phone so nobody will try to contact her. Thus any correspondence will be by mail through the service.

But things run amok. Their imaginary dating profile matches with a nearby psychopath. The funniest part of the film is this guy's inner monologue translated into hippie talk - "Gotta stay cool. Don't get too heavy.... She'll think this is groovy" And so on. The guy sounds like Austin Powers without the charm and flair for fashion. And everything is about him, perceiving every coincidence or mix up as some lie or disrespect paid to him. This leads to him believing that a girl he picks up in a bar is actually his computer date, and when she says she is not, he kills her.

The four older women read about the crime in the news and think it has something to do with their computer dating antics, and thus begin their investigation, bumping into the police several times along the way.

Of the four older ladies Helen Hayes is supposed to be the most modern one with the most precocious ideas. But they don't make this ridiculous like some films did of 50 years ago, having older women act like 25 year old hippies, just in older bodies.

Four stalwart actresses from Hollywood's golden era pair a quartet of old ladies with too much time on their hands. have they no grandchildren to spoil?

Helen Hayes, Myrna Loy, Sylvia Sidney, and Mildred Natwick decide one fine day to create a fictitious character for a computer dating service. They sit by and watch the fun as the local psycho Vince Edwards selects this fictional woman as his dream date. Unfortunately real life call girl Barbara Davis falls into this identity and is killed for her trouble.

I didn't find anything particularly amusing here. These women and their silly games caused a homicide.

Four stalwarts of the silver screen. You've all done better work.

This is the perfect vehicle for veteran actresses Helen Hayes, Myrna Loy, Mildred Natwick and Sylvia Sidney. Four little old ladies living comfortably in Pasadena, reminiscing about their youth. Their flavor of the month pass time is participating in a computer dating service as a joke. Surely, this would be more amusing than their last adventure, when they decided to fill out military draft forms. Their little game leads to a string of unfortunate events, including the murder of a young prostitute.

What could have been made into a serious formula detective drama was helped by clever and amusing dialog, and the absolutely delightful quartet of aging stars, each in the typical character played so many different times over their long screen and stage careers: Sidney as the chain-smoking busybody, Natwick as the old-maid type always flattered by any attention given to her by men, Loy as the reasonable adult in the room, and Hayes as the lovable old lady with an answer for everything, for which she had just won the Academy Award the year before.

This is definitely entertainment of the 1970s, but a smart script like this one will be appreciated by audiences of all ages for generations to come. And, yes, that's "Dr. Ben Casey" as the unstable chauvinist, playing much against his beloved 1960s TV character. - This Comedy-Drama will bring joy to anybody out there with a flair for Hollywood Nostalgia. They don't write stories like this anymore, and they certainly no longer have the likes of real stars to play the parts.

This movie was the possible inspiration for the TV movie and series that followed, "The Snoop Sisters."

This cast is even more formidable than the Snoop Sisters - instead of two elderly ladies, this has four. And what a group! Helen Hayes, Mildred Natwick, Sylvia Sidney, and Myrna Loy. Poor Vincent Edwards doesn't have a chance against them.

The bored ladies decide to fill out a computer dating form, using an imaginary woman, of course, and wind up with a very eager Edwards.

Computer dating has come a long way, but alas, it's still pretty easy to attract a character like Edwards. The four women are adorable and it's worth it just to have a chance to watch them in action. Hayes and Natwick went on to play elderly detectives in "The Snoop Sisters."