Suzanne Pleshette: Patience Barton

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Patience Barton

Doc Schultz: Patience, you got to stop shooting at people. You know something? If you wasn't such a terrible shot, there wouldn't be a young man alive in all of Purgatory. I heard you shot at Elmer Price in the lobby of the hotel yesterday evening.
Patience: Well, he asked me to marry him!
Doc Schultz: You think that's reason enough to shoot at a man?

Patience: [Trying on a showy dress that Abigail has given her] Ya' think... ya' think I look like a lady of the evening?
Abigail: Wha... What's a "lady of the evening"?
Patience: Oh, Miss Abigail, you DO lead a sheltered life!

Taylor Barton: [Kewpie dolls hit the street in front of the Bartons] What in heaven's name are these?
Bud Barton: That's a Kewpie doll. I won one of them once at the State Fair, time I went to Denver all by myself.
Patience: And got rolled by some floozy!
Bud Barton: Aw, shut up...

Patience: [Curious about Latigo Smith's mysterious illness] What's wrong with him, Doc?
Doc Schultz: You know a doc can't talk about his patients, Patience.

Patience: Now I have sworn me a vow that I am going back east to Miss Hunter's College on the Hudson River New York for young ladies of good family and ain't nothing gonna stop me!

Latigo: I don't like anything west of Riverside Drive.
Patience: Where's that?
Latigo: New York City.
Patience: On the Hudson River?
Latigo: Yeah, born and raised there.
Patience: Tell me about it!
Latigo: Tell you what about it?
Patience: ALL!
Latigo: Well let's see, they, they don't carry guns. And they got a cop on every street corner to keep people from shootin' one another.

Taylor Barton: [Patience Barton - his daughter - is wildly shooting up the town with a rifle] What the hell do ya' think you're doin'!
Patience: I'm teachin' these jackass miners a lesson!
Taylor Barton: [Taylor Barton and son Oroville rush out and subdue Patience as she stops to reload] How many times have I told you not to shoot at people?
Patience: Well, they had it comin'! One of them said something vile to me. He said "Does your mother know you're out, Cecilia?"
Taylor Barton: You consider that grounds for shootin' up the whole town?
Patience: I KNOW what he meant!
Taylor Barton: Well I sure as hell don't!

Patience: I'm the new girl.
Effie: You is?
Patience: Ah, yeah. I just - just got in this morning from Frisco. In fact, that's my name - Frisco.
Effie: Well, it's nice work. It has its ups and downs, but it *is* nice work.
[walks away and laughs]

Latigo: I see a situation here where - an honest man could make a dollar. Come on.
Patience: Where are you goin'?
Latigo: Among my other bad habits, I'm a Peeping Tom.

Patience: [blast, jumps into Latigo's arms, looks up, bats her eyes] Fire in the hole.