Werewolves on Wheels

If you watch B movies long enough, you'll learn that movies with goofy titles usually aren't very good at all, and this one is no exception. It plays like they only had a rough outline connecting a few scripted scenes, because a lot of the time the movie forgets the story and has the bikers basically goofing around until something bad happens. A low budget and clumsy camera work just add to the aura of shabbiness.

I can't completely dismiss it, because there are a few small but good touches here and there. Some of the music isn't bad, and there are also a few visuals (a gigantic flock of birds, desert landscapes) that do pop out and grab your eye. And there are also a few surreal sequences that do show that the filmmakers were not completely without imagination. But such moments are very few, and don't even get this movie up to the rank of movies to watch with fast-forward.

This was a cool, funky little film, kind of an attempt to mix Easy Rider with any werewolf film. The Devils Advocates are a dirty, sleazy, nasty biker gang who live on the road, stopping only to sleep, drink and screw. When they stop one night at the foot of a Satanic Temple, and are offered food and drink by the monks, their life on the road gets a little weirder.

No, sadly, you really don't get to see hairy werewolves howling maniacally as they drive down dark highways illuminated by the full moon. What you do get is an attempt at artiness, as scenes are intercut with shots of black birds wheeling through the still air, a drugged girl dances naked before a fire as deranged monks deliver a spooky chant and a tarot reader displays talents more accurate than many I've seen in the movies. There's some absolutely hysterical additional dialogue and parts of the film almost have a documentary type feel to it. No, it's not the worlds most flawless film by any means, but it's better than a lot of the crap that was coming out around the same time. It has a realistic grittiness to it, yet at the same time possesses an ethereal atmosphere. It was just funky enough to impress me.

I have wanted to see this movie for YEARS, considering it has one of the greatest titles ever. What I was hoping for was bikers riding along in full wolfman makeup, like the poster suggests. What I got was hippies galavanting across a desert and two(I think its two, it might be just one) members of the crew change into wolf form within the last 2-3 minutes of the movie. I can't say that I think it's art, unless you can watch 'Manos, the Hands of Fate" and think that's art...attempted art, I suppose. To be clear, this movie is NOT as bad as Manos, as very few movies ever made are awful to that degree. Still, the title made me think I would enjoy this movie enthusiastically as it implies the kind of shlocky camp I find amusing and I came away incredibly disappointed...and bored.

While shaky in premise, Werewolves on Wheels contains all the absurdity, excess and self-awareness necessary to maintain interest. The plot roams all over the place, the actors mumble a lot of their lines and the ending is distinctly dissatisfying - but nevertheless it's well worth 85 minutes of your time. A rowdy gang of bikers who call themselves the Devil's Advocates shows up at a gas station in the middle of the desert to terrorizes the attendant, then proceeds to stumble upon a monastery while partying in a nearby forest. The ominous monks share suspect bread and wine, greedily indulged upon by the rowdy gang. When they're too drunk to notice, head monk `One,' an interesting role for the usually funny Severn Darden, plucks a hair from one of their heads and places it in a bat buckle. He then prays to Satan and kills a cat. The fun begins at this point, and biker lady D. J. Anderson materializes for some sort of dark ritual. When the bikers realize she's gone missing, they seek out the monks and beat the living pulp out of them. The bikers think little of the events that have transpired, but the following night at the campfire Anderson seems to suck head biker Stephen Oliver's blood, and a mock Satanic dance culminates in the grisly deaths of two members of the gang. After terrorizing another gas station they roam around the desert pretending to make a movie, creating a distinctly self-reflective mood. Nonsense-preaching Duece Berry (whose character is named `Tarot') tries to warn Oliver that something's in the air but he'll have none of his buddy's mystic mumbo-jumbo. They burn a pile of old cars and Anderson sees foreboding signs in the flames. Much of the same insanity carries the film right up to its vague conclusion. Writer-director Michael Levesque, who worked on a couple of Russ Meyer films, is a decent enough filmmaker and the camera work and editing and enjoyable, but the film suffers from over-abuse of the zoom. At least three cast members also appeared in The Last Movie, also made in 1971, and folk singer Barry McGuire appears as a member of the bike gang. Most of the rest of the cast are stunt performers, including a number of the leads. Don Gere provides an excellent psychedelic soundtrack, by far the best of any biker movie I've seen. The unusually diverse cast and enthusiastic amateur creative spirit create an atmosphere more exciting than the majority of contemporary genre filmmaking. What it all comes down to is that this a movie for people who like to drink in the morning, like myself.

I can't give this high marks because a lot was left unrevealed, as if there was no cohesive story from the start. Was there symbology in the grime-covered skin of the Satanists transferring over to the bikers as they scuffle, only for the last bikers to fall into the life of deviltry? Was there symbolism in the free and savage outlaw lifestyle of bikers who simply followed their leader, who then turn into tribal dust-covered chanters around a campfire? Was there symbolism in the monks removing everything holy from the church and making it their own, leading unknown bikers to use their land for partying, thinking Christian monks would leave them to their own devices, not knowing that Satanic monks would force themselves onto them? It was entertaining enough though. The soundtrack helped invoke the carefree outlaw biker feel along with grit and decadence. Seemingly asexual character Tarot was the spiritual voice of reason that could save the day, while leader Adam was too mean and angry to hear reason, and the rest were just Yes Men to Adam, but Tarot also lacks conviction and faith, depending too much on his own understanding to convince others to act differently. As bikers go, it definitely had the feel, as werewolves go, it could have used a lot more. I didn't like the intensity of the Satanic rituals but you can't say Tarot didn't try to turn the others away.