Zuma Beach

Not bad for a tv movie of the week..Has a real nice 70's feel..Like the guys howling at her driving thru the mountains(You'd be arrested today)Rosanna and Kimberly never looked better.

I can definitely think of worse ways to spend a weekend afternoon than watching this 70's jigglefest that is so reminiscent of the scads of beach movies that originated in the early 60's. Not nearly as engrossing as the best of the genre (see California Dreaming), but it does provide early screen work from Timothy Hutton, "Terminator"'s Michael Biehn, and a fantastically scrumptious Rosanna Arquette. Credits indicate an appearance by Delta Burke; look fast for I did not see her.

'Zuma Beach' stars Suzanne Somers as Bonnie Katt, a fading pop star who heads for the title location for some R & R. During one eventful day, she becomes involved in the lives of the various young folk who frequent the place.

Don't look for much more plot than that in this script that was co-written by John Carpenter, whose slasher film "Halloween" was a big hit the same year that this TV movie premiered. It may not exactly be intellectually stimulating, but it does provide decent, light entertainment with some poignant moments.

Somers, hot off the successful second season of 'Three's Company', is likeable enough (and does actually sing her own songs), and yes, viewers who just want to see her in a bathing suit for 98 minutes may be fairly satisfied. The script involves rivalries, guys on the make (naturally), a young man (Mark Wheeler) thinking of leaving for greener pastures, a local figure (Steven Keats) who's built himself into this sort of mythic character, and a climactic beach volleyball game.

'Zuma Beach' is mostly noteworthy for the selection of future stars and otherwise familiar faces in the cast. Michael Biehn is fun as an antagonistic jock named J. D., but everybody here does an ingratiating job.

Overall, a nice, pleasant beach movie with attractive ladies and equally attractive photography.

Six out of 10.

Pop singer in Los Angeles is told the record business has forgotten her--she had a hit single two years ago, but her last album lost money. She responds to this rejection by driving to the beach--her childhood sanctuary--to play in the sand and flirt with the impressionable 18-year-olds. History repeating itself: a sun-kissed 1970s update of the beach party genre, which hadn't been in vogue since the mid-'60s. Although written by John Carpenter (in his salad days) and William Schwartz, from a treatment by John Herman Shaner and Alvin Ramrus, this TV-movie has sunshine and wet sand to spare but doesn't have the canny lingo of hormone-crazed teenagers down right. Suzanne Somers, still riding high with "Three's Company", shows polish in the lead, but the younger players are hit-and-miss. Rosanna Arquette needs help rolling a joint, P.J. Soles is tired of playing volleyball, Timothy Hutton is training to be a lifeguard, Michael Biehn (as "J.D.") ruins Suzanne's sandcastle, and Tanya Roberts (with a belly-chain) is a knockout pretending to be just another dateless chick in the crowd. Not credible for one instant, and embarrassing when it tries for seriousness, but at least the scenarists keep it relatively clean. These kids want romance! How's that for a beach come-on?

'Zuma Beach' is strictly a jiggle-and-giggle flick, as one commentator once put it so aptly, designed to get TV ratings and nothing more. Suzanne Somers was in the midst of her successful (and horrible) network series 'Three's Company' at the time this was made and the idea was to strike while the iron was hot.

Somers plays some kind of rock singer, believe it or not, who is experiencing a career crisis of sorts and comes out to the beach to clear her mind and look for inspiration, or something like that. The local high school beach boys just about lose their minds when they see her stretch out on the beach, though I find their own bikini-clad girlfriends such as Rosanna Arquette, Kimberly Beck and P.J. Soles a lot sexier. Somehow all their lives get intertwined, and through making sand castles and playing volleyball Suzanne somehow manages to instill self-confidence and worth in a number of these youths while finding new inspiration for her own career. Amazing.

This is the type of empty entertainment that one can find enjoyable from time to time even if it's only because it gives you a good laugh. Some of the faux-Beach Boys songs on the soundtrack may have you and your dog howling at the screen together, though.