Charles Gray credited as playing...
Judge Oliver Wright
- Brad Majors, Janet Majors: [in song] Some people do it for each other.
- Judge Oliver Wright, Betty Hapschatt: Some people do it for their lover.
- Brad Majors, Janet Majors: Some people do it for improvement.
- Judge Oliver Wright, Betty Hapschatt: Some people do it for the movement.
- Brad Majors, Janet Majors: Some people do it for enjoyment.
- Judge Oliver Wright, Betty Hapschatt: Some people do it for employment.
- Brad Majors, Janet Majors, Judge Oliver Wright, Betty Hapschatt: But, we're gonna do it anyhow, anyhow. We're gonna do it anyhow, anyhow. We're gonna do it no matter how the wind is blowing. We're gonna do it anyhow, anyhow. We're gonna do it anyhow, anyhow. We're gonna do it. We just gotta keep going.
- Betty Hapschatt: Look at that, Bert Schnik's dancing! Bert can see!
- Judge Oliver Wright: Macabre, isn't it? The blind leading the blind.
- Audience: [Brad has just burst through a set piece onto the stage] Aah! It's the crazy man!
- Brad Majors: [to Farley] Seducer!
- Farley Flavors: [nervous] And... who are you, sir?
- Brad Majors: Your twin brother and your accuser!
- Janet Majors: Brad!
- Cosmo: Arrest that man! He's committed to our care!
- Janet Majors: I never signed your contract! He's not going anywhere.
- Judge Oliver Wright: To revenge your twin, you tried to abuse her.
- Farley Flavors: A ridiculous accusation! You... force me to refuse her.
- Brad Majors: Then why did you choose her?
- Farley Flavors: Because of you, *sir*!
- Betty Hapschatt: What's happening here? Janet's on "The Breakfast Show," Brad's committed to a nowhere series, and we've been...
- Judge Oliver Wright: Written out?
- Judge Oliver Wright: Isn't that Brad and Janet Majors sitting in the audience there? What an ideal couple they are. More than anyone else in Denton, they represent the old values. Ike would have been proud of them.
- Betty Hapschatt: Did you enjoy our anthem?
- Judge Oliver Wright: In a way.
- Betty Hapschatt: I detect a note of reticence. Are you perhaps one of those amongst us who feel that emotive forms of presentations are overly manipulative?
- Judge Oliver Wright: Well Betty, there are many ways that the spider may catch the fly.