Peter Graves credited as playing...
Captain Clarence Oveur
- Simon: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain, Captain Oveur.
- Capt. Oveur: Gentlemen, welcome aboard.
- Simon: Captain, your navigator, Mr. Unger, and your first officer, Mr. Dunn.
- Capt. Oveur: Unger.
- Unger: Oveur.
- Dunn: Oveur.
- Capt. Oveur: Dunn. Gentlemen, let's get to work.
- Simon: Unger, didn't you serve under Oveur in the Air Force?
- Unger: Not directly. Technically, Dunn was under Oveur and I was under Dunn.
- Dunn: Yep.
- Simon: So, Dunn, you were under Oveur and over Unger.
- Unger: Yep.
- Capt. Oveur: That's right. Dunn was over Unger and I was over Dunn.
- Unger: So, you see, both Dunn and I were under Oveur, even though I was under Dunn.
- Capt. Oveur: Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn.
- Dunn: Uh, Captain, I'm picking up an overheat in the computer core.
- Capt. Oveur: How serious is it, Mr. Dunn?
- Dunn: Uh, I can't tell sir.
- Capt. Oveur: Well you can tell me - I'm the Captain.
- ROC: Voice interface.
- Elaine Dickinson: There's an overheat in the core. Please analyze problem.
- ROC: There is no apparent overheat.
- Elaine Dickinson: Yes, there is, ROC. We read a core overheat. Repeat analysis.
- ROC: Analysis confirmed. All systems compute positive.
- Elaine Dickinson: Well, not from where I'm sitting they don't!
- ROC: Look, Elaine. Cut the "not from where I'm sitting" shit. It must be a human error.
- [Elaine turns to the captain]
- Elaine Dickinson: Captain, I think we have a computer foul-up!
- Capt. Oveur: I see.
- Elaine Dickinson: Well, what do you recommend, Captain?
- Capt. Oveur: Maybe you'd better run it through the computer.
- Elaine Dickinson: But sir, I already have!
- Capt. Oveur: Good!
- Capt. Oveur: Well, my goodness, Scraps is a boy dog, isn't he?
- Jimmy: Yeah.
- Capt. Oveur: Jimmy, do you like it when Scraps holds onto your leg and rubs up and down?
- Testa: Captain, Mr. Dunn and Mr. Unger were sucked out an air lock in the computer room!
- Captain Clarence Oveur: Both together?
- Testa, Elaine Dickinson: [together] Mr. Dunn and Mr. Unger were sucked out an air lock in the computer room!
- Captain Clarence Oveur: Don't panic. Calm down, ladies. Now, are there any other problems?
- Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: [races in the cockpit] Captain, we've run out of coffee.
- Captain Clarence Oveur: Damn! If I've told them once I've told them a hundred times, store extra coffee!
- Testa, Shuttle Stewardess: Captain, what should we do if the passengers start to panic?
- Capt. Oveur: All right, this is the way we're gonna play it.
- [pulls out a marker and pad of paper]
- Capt. Oveur: Mary, I want you here in case there's a full-cabin press. Testa, you take the aisle here, cover Mary's weak side in case she gets double-teamed.
- Testa, Shuttle Stewardess, Mary, Shuttle Stewardess: Right!
- Capt. Oveur: Anti-gravity check.
- Dunn: All right.
- [presses a button, which causes the crewman in the spacesuit who is listening and moving to the beat of "Car Wash" on his headphones to float in the air]
- Dunn: Checks out in positive mode, sir.
- Capt. Oveur: Check.
- [the spacesuit man is still floating upside down]
- Dunn: Checks out in negative mode, sir.
- Capt. Oveur: Check.
- Dunn: Neutral balance seems all right, sir.
- Capt. Oveur: Good, that shall do it.
- Dunn: Anti-gravity off, sir.
- [Turns off the anti-gravity, causing the spacesuit crewman to fall to the floor]
- Capt. Oveur: Hope this weather doesn't give us a problem.
- [He sticks his hand out the window to feel the temperature]
- Capt. Oveur: Mr. Dunn, what's your temperature reading?
- Dunn: [takes thermometer out of his mouth and reads the mercury level] Uh, 98.6 sir.
- Capt. Oveur: That sounds normal.
- Dunn: Uh, sir, that overheat is getting worse. I'd better get back into the core and check it out.
- Capt. Oveur: Thanks, but I'd rather you check it out, Dunn.
- Dunn: Uh, right.
- Elaine Dickinson: Well, just to be on the safe side, should I check the rear data banks?
- Capt. Oveur: No. Why don't you check the rear data banks?
- Elaine Dickinson: Yes, sir.
- Elaine Dickinson: Captain, I don't think we have any alternatives.
- Capt. Oveur: I see. What do you think our alternatives are?
- Elaine Dickinson: We have to disconnect ROC's higher brain function without disturbing he's regulatory system.
- Capt. Oveur: That computer has a self-defense mechanism, Elaine. Dunn and Unger tried to disconnect it, you heard what happened to them.
- Elaine Dickinson: I know. Sucked out.