Gene Wilder credited as playing...
Michael Jordon
- [Michael and Kate are left in control of a small plane with a pilot who has had an apparent heart attack after a bout of burping and belching. A voice on the radio told them they're entering prohibited government airspace and, in grabbing the radio and handing it to Kate to talk, Michael broke the cabling to the transmitter]
- Michael Jordon: I knew this would happen! I dreamt about this all my life!
- Kate Hellman: Get ahold of yourself.
- Michael Jordon: Since I was a little boy, I dreamt this was gonna happen to me!
- Kate Hellman: Just get ahold of...
- Michael Jordon: Wait a minute. Ask Mr. Puckett: do I bring it in nose first or tail first?
- Kate Hellman: Michael he's *dead*!
- Michael Jordon: *Don't* say he's dead! Ask him!
- Kate Hellman: I can't ask him; he's dead!
- Michael Jordon: Will you shut up and ask him?
- Kate Hellman: [shouting] Mr. Puckett! Should he bring it in nose first or tail first?
- [no response]
- Michael Jordon: [calmly] What'd he say?
- Kate Hellman: [pounding Michael, screaming] *Michael, he's dead!*
- Michael Jordon: [in angry denial] He is not dead, God-!
- Kate Hellman: Yes he is! Do something!
- Michael Jordon: [fumbles around the controls] Where are the wheels?
- Kate Hellman: I don't know. Where are the wheels?
- Michael Jordon: Where are the wheels?
- Kate Hellman: [sarcastically] Oh, why don't you ask Mr. Puckett where the wheels are?
- Michael Jordon: Ha, ha, ha! And why can't I ask Mr. Puckett where the wheels are? Miss Smartass?
- Kate Hellman: Ah...
- Michael Jordon: Go on, say it!
- Kate Hellman: Oh, because he's dead.
- Michael Jordon: [re-angered] Will you stop saying he's *dead*? He has *gas*!
- [Kate successfully repairs and starts the fuel truck, then crashes it out the hangar doors, making their escape]
- Kate Hellman: Not bad, huh?
- Michael Jordon: What?
- Kate Hellman: [shouting] Not bad, huh?
- Michael Jordon: [exclaiming] You want compliments *now*?
- [Michael and Janet burst into the back of a taxi from opposite sides at the same time, bumping heads into shoulders]
- Michael Jordon: Oh, goddamn...
- [sees Janet for the first time]
- Michael Jordon: [to Janet] I love you!
- Janet Dunn: Get out of my cab!
- Michael Jordon: Where is it? Show it to me.
- Janet Dunn: [shouting over him] Get out of my cab right now!
- Michael Jordon: I'd love to, just tell me which one it is.
- Janet Dunn: Driver!
- Janet Dunn: [through gritted teeth to Michael] Get out of my cab.
- Michael Jordon: This one is *my* cab.
- Cab Driver: Nah-ah!
- [the Driver turns to look back]
- Cab Driver: It's *my* cab. Now, will one of you tell me where to take it?
- Michael Jordon: Where do you wanna go, honey?
- Janet Dunn: [sees her pursuer behind them, looking for her] Uh...
- Michael Jordon: To your place or to mine?
- Janet Dunn: [with false calm] I don't care. Let's just go.
- Michael Jordon: Just go straight up Park Avenue, all right? We'll tell you exactly where once we finish negotiating.
- [a man in a dark suit and fedora watches their departure and takes note of the cab's plates. And so begins Michael Jordon's entanglement]