Matthew Broderick credited as playing...
Michael McPhee
- Michael McPhee: He's gonna go into philosophy.
- Nora McPhee: Why?
- Michael McPhee: 'Cause that's what he wanted.
- Nora McPhee: Who told you that?
- Michael McPhee: Mr. Wittgenstein.
- Nora McPhee: Who's Mr. Wittgenstein?
- Michael McPhee: Mr. Parker.
- Nora McPhee: Mr. Parker is Mr. Wittgenstein?
- [doorbell rings]
- Nora McPhee: Umm... oh... what did he tell you?... Look, don't go into uhh, what's his name's room. I think there's something severely wrong with him!
- [doorbell again]
- Max Dugan: Uh, do you want me to get that?
- Nora McPhee: It's the police!
- Max Dugan: Nevermind.
- [last lines]
- Michael McPhee: [seeing the Mercedes drive by] It that?
- Nora McPhee: My God, he's gonna drive to Brazil.
- Nora McPhee: [waving] So long pop...
- Michael McPhee: [looking at the new refrigerator] It has an ice crusher!
- Nora McPhee: Don't crush ice! Don't crush anything! It's a mistake! It doesn't belong to us!
- Max Dugan: My name isn't Parker.
- Michael McPhee: Its not?
- Max Dugan: No. Its Wittgenstein.
- Michael McPhee: Wittgenstein?
- Max Dugan: Gus Wittgenstein.
- Max Dugan: [Mike points the camcorder at Max] No, Mike, not me.
- Michael McPhee: Why not?
- Max Dugan: Well, certain primitive tribes believe that pictures steal your soul, and I don't have too much soul.
- Max Dugan: You won it.
- Nora McPhee: What?
- Max Dugan: On a TV show.
- Nora McPhee: I was never on a TV show!
- Max Dugan: It was one of those TV shows you don't have to be on. I was finishing up the breakfast dishes when there's a knock at the door , and in comes a lawyer with a blue suit...
- Nora McPhee: No.
- Max Dugan: No?
- Nora McPhee: No, no. I don't think I won this, I never won anything in my life. This is a mistake!
- Max Dugan: But it had your name and address on the invoice. I signed for you. Now, she'll probably have to go down and do a few publicity pictures but the stuff is yours.
- Michael McPhee: Maybe it's on the six o'clock news!
- Nora McPhee: It's not on the six o'clock news, just turn that off and put everything down... a man with a blue suit, huh?