Lane Davies credited as playing...
Mason Capwell
- [Struggling to come up with nice things to say about Gina]
- Mason: Well, I never actually saw her pull the wings off butterflies.
- Mason: Someday I think it would be amusing if great historians debated who was worse CC Capwell or Attila the Hun.
- Julia Wainwright Capwell: No, Gracie, you can't push yet! Not 'til the baby's head's out!
- Mason: Julia, if the woman wants to push...
- Julia Wainwright Capwell: What'd you do, get a uterus for Christmas?
- Mason: You want me to be the boy's father when my father is already his father, and his real father was my brother who wasn't really my brother?
- Mason: [Warren shows up looking disheveled and asking for C.C] Most people look like this after they've seen him, not before.
- Mason: My father is going through one of his phases. It happens every 12 years or so, all of a sudden he starts being nice. Something to do with the orbit of Jupiter I believe. I could almost hear his smile muscles creaking.
- Mason: Lily knew what was best for me. All she had to do was to touch my forehead and I lost my desire for alcohol.
- Gina Timmons: I wonder what she had to touch to make you forget about sex.
- Mason: Gina, men aren't as simple as you think.
- Gina Timmons: And now you're going to explain it all to me. Everything I've always wanted to know about men, but was too bored to ask.
- Gina Timmons: Mason, would you like me better if I basked in glorious light and donned a white robe?
- Mason: As I recall, disrobing was your specialty.
- Gina Timmons: I'm going to arrange for Ted and Hayley to live with us after C.C. and I are married. We're going to be one big happy family.
- Mason: Like Ma Barker and her kids.
- Gina Timmons: I get so emotional, I always want to cry at weddings.
- Mason: I imagine your husbands do the same thing.
- Mason: [Talking to Lily about Gina's upcoming wedding] Gina and high society, there's a contradiction in terms. Why don't you buy her a blender and then put her in it.