Richard Mulligan credited as playing...
Leo Brody
- Maid of Honor: [after catching the bouquet at Rob and Maude's wedding] I guess I'm next.
- Leo Brody: Oh, I don't think he has the time.
- [speaking of Rob]
- Rob Salinger: I don't want to divorce, Micki, I just want to marry Maude.
- Leo Brody: You can't have your cake and eat it too.
- Rob Salinger: I've been with her for ten years. I can't give them up just like that. And it's have your cake and eat it too.
- Leo Brody: What do you mean?
- Rob Salinger: To have your cake, anyone can do. To eat it and still have some left, that's the trick.
- Leo Brody: Eat your cake, have your cake, who cares? You're about to get a plate of sauteed brains thrown into your face, your entire career is the toilet, and you're correcting my grammar?
- Leo Brody: [to Rob] Oh, my God. You look like someone just took out all your blood and replaced it with milk.
- Rob Salinger: What am I supposed to say? "Micki, a decade is a long time to be intimate with another human being, but I'm..."
- Leo Brody: A little stiff. A little stiff, Rob. How about "Dear..."?
- Rob Salinger: Dear? What do you mean "dear"? I don't call her "dear", she's a lawyer.
- Leo Brody: Oh... "Councilor"? I'm just not good enough for you.
- Rob Salinger: Oh! Common, Leo... Jesus! Wait a minute. Uhm... Oh! Common, Leo... Jesus! Wait a minute. Uhm... "Sometimes in a relationship, uhm... Sometimes in a relationship things happen that neither party anticipates."
- Leo Brody: Yeah, you've got the punch, now you need the pillow.
- Rob Salinger: What do you mean?
- Leo Brody: You'll gonna knock her out with this news, you need a pillow for her to land on.
- Rob Salinger: Yeah, I suppose...
- Leo Brody: "Micki, I love you. I'll always love you."
- Rob Salinger: Yeah.
- Leo Brody: Uhm... "These years with you, I've seen you blossom from a young girl into a mature woman."
- Rob Salinger: No, no, no. I mean, she was always a mature woman, even at 25.
- Leo Brody: All right, you like the part "Micki, I love you. I'll always love you", like that, right?
- Rob Salinger: Look, Leo. It's all right, but it's not exp...
- Leo Brody: Well, "Micki, I love you. I'll always love you..."
- Rob Salinger: "And... and... I'm..."
- Leo Brody: "... and I've knocked up a girl, I'm gonna marry and I want a divorce."
- Rob Salinger: Great, where's the pillow?
- Leo Brody: "We'd like to name the baby after you."