Attack of the Beast Creatures

After their ship sinks "somewhere in the North Atlantic", the survivors make their way to a seemingly deserted island. Little do they know, they're not alone. Astonishingly, the group splits up, heading off in several different directions. This proves to be... unwise.

ATTACK OF THE BEAST CREATURES, in addition to having one of the greatest titles ever, is low-budget, imbecilic terror at its zenith! It wastes no time at all in becoming as ridiculous as possible! The lack of any funding is an asset, allowing for the title "monsters" to emerge, hitting us like hickory planks to our faces! You'll sit wide-eyed and slack-jawed as these killer dolls begin their onslaught!

The cast, though akin to human furniture, is fun to watch, especially when they die!

AWESOME SCENES: #1- A man dunks his head into a stream for a drink, and comes up a bit... lightheaded! #2- Another man is completely relieved of his skinsuit!

I want a BEAST CREATURE doll for my birthday! You will too!...

I LOVE a good low-budget horror movie. Thing is it needs to be good. Here, we have a movie that looks like it has a budget of $250 and yes that includes the FX.

We enter the story as a group of people have been shipwrecked and so they drift aimlessly through the water in their lifeboat named Obelisk. Soon they hit land after the credits end and due to brutal lighting what looks like angry, spoiled sausages attack them in the night. By first light we see they actually look like ravenous, haunted dolls. Time to try and stay alive.

The music by John P. Mozzi is actually quite effective and way better than this movie deserves. Super bad acting by almost everyone in this movie.

Might be good to sit down with a good friend with some of your favourite beers and/or whiskey and get some good laughs. Otherwise steer clear.

Despite what you may have read or heard, this silly low-budgeter is a great rental despite whatever shortcomings it has. However, you might have an impossible time trying to track down a tape because this has been out of circulation for years.

Filmed in 1983, this concerns the struggle for survival among a small group of shipwreck survivors on a secluded island (really inland Fairfield, Connecticut, where this was filmed). A seemingly innocent water stream is actually full of acid as one poor parched man soon finds out, and worse, the island is home a cult of small, killer, TRILOGY OF TERROR-style dolls. The dolls have red faces, long black hair, glow-in-the-dark eyes and sharp pointy teeth. Their jaws open so they can screech and their arms move up and down when they scurry through the woods, but other than that, they are hilariously immobile.

I don't want to get too much into the story, but some of the assault/ambush techniques devised by the little critters are very amusing and the low-level POV camera-work and eerie music score service the entertaining story very well. This film is a blast!

Score: 6 out of 10

A kinetic, out-if-the-ordinary skid-row monster movie that turned out good against all odds(my use of the word "good", mind you, being pertinent to entertainment value as opposed to aesthetic quality). The title terrors are a tribe of screaming, white-eyed, 10"(that's right...ten inch) toothy trolls with long hair, which besiege their prey like a school of spear-wielding land-piranha. Potential victims-to-be are a handful of shipwreck survivors washed ashore on an uncharted tropical island inhabited by the "beast creatures". These unfortunate souls have more to contend with than the monsters alone, namely rivers of acid, hunger, thirst, and each other.

A perfect example of a no-budget monster movie that managed to get it right...I'd recommend this over the bulk of widely recognized titles any day, and with little hesitation.

6/10...fun stuff.

This was a real treat. The film starts off a little slow, so hang in there because once the action starts you will probably choke on your beer or mountain dew out of sheer hysterical laughter. In my journey through "grade Z" movies, it is movies like Attack of the Beast Creatures that make it all worth it. This is the type of movie that I put on that "special shelf" for the friends that don't want to have to think or invest much of themselves into a film. For those friends who you would like to impress with a movie so bad, that it is just beautiful. This was made at a time when bad films were at least still shot on film. Now days "grade z" movies are shot on daddy's new digital camcorder, so they don't have any real cinematic quality. This has some cinematic quality...OK, cinematic quality in a really "grade z" kind of way.

If you want Freddie Kreuger, Jason, or The Ring Meets the Grudge Part 4, then go to your local Blockbuster. Leave the trash to us trashmongers...I love it!