Private Resort

First of all, let's get something straight. This is in fact the best spring break comedy of the 80's. However, that means it is the best of the 4 or 5 spring break comedies that came out between 1983-1985, really the only two years of the 1980's that had spring break comedies. Therefore, I'm talking about movies like Spring Break, Where the Boys Are, Hot Resort, and Fraternity Vacation, so which also means this is pretty much just a sex comedy. Of all these, Private Resort is by far and away the best one. It follows two young guys, Depp and Morrow, who are just looking to get laid and in the meantime get in trouble with hotel security, Andrew Dice Clay, and Hector Elizondo before his Chicago Hope days. Also, not to mention the beautiful girls throughout the movie, but what else do you expect? As a result, this is a truly underrated sex comedy, but don't bother to watch it on Comedy Central, because like Casino and Goodfellas, it has to be seen uncut. **+ out of ****

BA,BA,BA, BA-BA-BA-BA-BA......

Obviously this isn't a movie to be taken seriously and it may even be arguably offensive to women but I would take 'Private Resort' any day over the supposed 'comedy' flicks that feature the likes of Adam Sandler and Seth Rogan. There isn't much in terms of story. It's pretty much about two young men in their early twenties who go to a private resort to get laid. Meanwhile a jewel thief looks to steal a diamond necklace from a martial arts expert grandmother. It's definitely very silly but highly amusing. There's plenty of slapstick and overall cheesiness but the humour works and it has the right energy. Johnny Depp and Rob Morrow's on-screen camaraderie is a delight to watch as they provide the funniest scenes. Both actors have come a long way since and it was fun to see them as their young selves playing horny kids. Hector Elizondo is funny too. There's plenty of nudity to keep the viewer further entertained. It also depicts the 80's fashion (with big puffy hair and funny clothes). Overall, it's a fun little flick that has some nostalgic value.

I knew nothing of this film before I saw it. It was a free "On Demand" film from Comcast. I didn't even know Johnny Depp was in it. I thought the plot description (which was vague) sounded like every other girl-crazy sex comedy released after "Animal House," and I got what I expected.

To be fair this is entertaining. No, it's not a great movie. It's not very well made. It's crude. It's sexist. It's all about sex.

But that's exactly what it's supposed to be. Graded by the standards of its genre, it works.

It's about two kids (one of whom is played by Johnny Depp) who gain access to a private resort in the middle of the Caribbean (presumably). There's no backdrop. We don't even know how they got in to the resort. And they look about 16, so it's odd to see them going after women in their 30s and 40s (sometimes succeeding).

Depp wasn't famous yet (correct me if I'm wrong but this was his first starring role in a film to speak of?) and this certainly didn't help boost his career (he took a considerably smaller role in Oliver Stone's "Platoon" the year after) but he displays charisma and good charm that would carry on into his later movies.

The film's take-it-as-it-is attitude makes it entertaining. It's a simple sex comedy with crude laughs and running gags, a lot of which aren't very funny, a few of which are, almost all of which are at the least amusing.

Worth catching if you see it on cable some time.

Private Resort is a wildly hilarious romp through the world of the vacation resort industry.

Johnny Depp shines in one of his earlier acting roles as Jack, a horndog who is out for tail at any price.

(It should be noted to any fan of the Depp that he shows his naked backside in this movie. Not that I enjoyed it or anything...)

This is a must see. Watch for the Jeff Spicolli-like character Mike. He has maybe 3 lines in the movie, but they have stuck with me since I first saw this movie in the seventh grade.

Take a typical 80's B-comedy, and give the two male leads to two actors who would go on to awards and world fame.

Believe me or not, Depp and Morrow take two stock characters and make the material seem that much better; suddenly Jack and Ben hold the film together, rather than just reacting to everything within a narrow character description. Okay, so it's not art, but it's interesting from a film education perspective, if nothing else.

The script and direction aren't bad either, for a 1980's sex romp. Would have liked to see the director go on to better material. Ah, well.

7/10, for effort and sheer amusement value.