Private Resort

Before Johnny Depp went on to major big screen career and befre Rob Morrrow starred in Northern Exposure on the small screen they starrred together as a pair of horny teens at a Florida resort looking to score. Morrow especially as he's trying to lose his virginity.

This is one fast paced comedy as Depp and Morrow get into ione scrape after another. One od the peole pursuing is Hector Elizondo a jewel thief who is after the diamond ring that Dodie Goodman gas. Dodie is grandmother and chaperone of Emily Longstreth ho Depp has his eye on.

Morrow makes friends with one of the young staff Karyn O'Bryan who is fending off the advances of a really obnoxious server Michael Bowen. Both plotlines intersect with the other many times throughout Private Resort.

A personal connection I had to this film was Tony Azito, tall rubber legged actor who stole the film as the hapless house detective He did some amazing comic pratfalls as just about everyone in the cast gets the better of him.

My connection to Tony Azito stems from my working days at the New York State Crime Victims Board when I visited him at his Greenich Village apartment after he had been hit by a car at Christopher and West Streets in Manhattan. Both legs were broken and I did his claim for unreimbursed medical expenses and loss of earnings. He was a good and gracious soul.

So to you Tony Azito this rview is dedicated.

I knew nothing of this film before I saw it. It was a free "On Demand" film from Comcast. I didn't even know Johnny Depp was in it. I thought the plot description (which was vague) sounded like every other girl-crazy sex comedy released after "Animal House," and I got what I expected.

To be fair this is entertaining. No, it's not a great movie. It's not very well made. It's crude. It's sexist. It's all about sex.

But that's exactly what it's supposed to be. Graded by the standards of its genre, it works.

It's about two kids (one of whom is played by Johnny Depp) who gain access to a private resort in the middle of the Caribbean (presumably). There's no backdrop. We don't even know how they got in to the resort. And they look about 16, so it's odd to see them going after women in their 30s and 40s (sometimes succeeding).

Depp wasn't famous yet (correct me if I'm wrong but this was his first starring role in a film to speak of?) and this certainly didn't help boost his career (he took a considerably smaller role in Oliver Stone's "Platoon" the year after) but he displays charisma and good charm that would carry on into his later movies.

The film's take-it-as-it-is attitude makes it entertaining. It's a simple sex comedy with crude laughs and running gags, a lot of which aren't very funny, a few of which are, almost all of which are at the least amusing.

Worth catching if you see it on cable some time.

Not exactly a historic film, but quite hilarious none the less. A sex comedy that showed a lot of the time and got some laughs. Johnny Depp did very well for being one of his first movies. Very good in general, and i would strongly advise you see it.

Private Resort (1985)

*** (out of 4)

Incredibly stupid but funny teenage sex romp has two teens (Rob Morrow, Johnny Depp) staying at a rich Florida resort where there's plenty of beautiful women to try and get in bed. Also on hand is a jewel thief (Hector Elizondo), a muscle bound ladies man (Andrew Dice Clay) and various other nuts. If you want high level comedy of Billy Wilder then you best stay away from this film but if you want juvenile humor mixed in with beautiful women getting naked then this film is just for you. This is clearly a rip of Porky's and all the comedy is incredibly dumb but it's still funny. Elizondo steals the show as the wannabe Mafia guy but Morrow and Depp are also fun to watch. Leslie Easterbrook from the Police Academy films also stars (and yes, she's naked).

Take a typical 80's B-comedy, and give the two male leads to two actors who would go on to awards and world fame.

Believe me or not, Depp and Morrow take two stock characters and make the material seem that much better; suddenly Jack and Ben hold the film together, rather than just reacting to everything within a narrow character description. Okay, so it's not art, but it's interesting from a film education perspective, if nothing else.

The script and direction aren't bad either, for a 1980's sex romp. Would have liked to see the director go on to better material. Ah, well.

7/10, for effort and sheer amusement value.