Too Scared to Scream

Rating: *** out of five

Too Scared to Scream is actually a better slasher movie from the 1980's than many would expect. Mike Connors (from TV's Mannix) plays a police detective with his partner (Anne Archer, in one of her first major screen roles) who try and solve puzzling murders that are happening at a sky rise apartment building in New York. There are a few suspects including the apartment building's gentle, kind doorman (Ian McShane) who lives with his mute, paralyzed mother (Maureen O'Sullivan, who played Jane in the Tarzan films). Other suspects include a fashion designer (Sully Boyer), and countless persons in and around the building. The film has aged poorly, and the script could have used some more originally and maybe a larger budget since it was not picked up by a major distribution studio, but Tony Lo Bianco's solid direction and fine acting and special effects and suspenseful musical score make this film a tense shocker. Supporting actors include John Heard, Ruth Ford, Leon Issac Kennedy, Carrie Nye and even Murray Hamilton, who we remember as Mayor Vaughn in Jaws. Charles Azonvour sings the film's song "I'll Be There" in the opening sequence.

This early 80's slasheresque movie is pretty bad really, but I kind of liked it for some reason. It involves a number of murders in a swanky high rise building. The killings are investigated by a male and female cop, and the main suspect is the reddest herring imaginable--a doorman and aspiring way off-Broadway actor. There is some blood, a lot of gratuitous nudity, and that sleazy urban ambiance of the early 80's also featured in movies like "Eyes of a Stranger", "Windows", as well as genuinely disturbing flicks like "Maniac" and "Nightmare in a Damaged Brain". It was one of the last of the gritty, downbeat 70's style exploitation flicks before the happy fascism of the Reagan era and before Rudy Guliani turned 42nd Street into Disneyland.

The movie was directed by obscure cult actor Tony LoBianca who appeared in "The Honeymoon Killers" and "God Told Me To". He never directed another movie, and I'm not sure how he ever came to direct this one. The female lead is Anne Archer, who was later in "Fatal Attraction" (and I'd rather watch this movie any day than that overrated and reactionary piece of crap). It's pretty hard to find (I bought a used PAL video in Buenos Aires for about 30 cents I think), but not a COMPLETE waste of time if you stumble across it.

If you are looking for a good horror movie, go away. If you are looking to be scared, again, go away. But if you are looking for a nice way to spend the afternoon with an OK, cliched, but somehow still enjoyable and charming crime story with unusually high amount of nudity, you will like this. It has everything you would expect, from cheesy scenes to genre staple old and experienced detective leading the investigation. I give it 6.5/10! I think it's an OK movie which I could watch again, if I by chance stumble upon it on TV... I recommend it for some casual fun :)

There's something curiously fascinating about the obscure and almost entirely forgotten mid-80s slasher entitled "Too Scared to Scream". In the blessed year 1985, director Tony Lo Bianco (primarily an actor and probably best known for his role as Lonely Hearts Murderer Ray Fernandez in "The Honeymoon Killers") seemingly attempted to make a mix of two specific exploitation sub-genres that were at the end of their glory days. I may just be imagining things, of course, but yours truly spotted in "Too Scared to Scream" a tribute to both the Italian Giallo and those typical New York 42nd Street Grindhouse trash flicks. The similarities with the Giallo are mainly to be found in the plotting department, as the film deals with a sadist killer who preferably slaughters lewd women when they are completely undressed and his/her favorite weapon is a giant butcher knife! There also are several (poor) attempts at plot twists, red herrings and even a surprise ending that is far-fetched and downright hilarious. As the icing on the cake, the investigation is led by a grumpy detective almost as misogynist as the culprit self. The link with the 42nd Street Grindhouse cinema obviously lies within the New York filming locations and its portrayal of the city. Very much like in modest classics such as "Maniac", "Ms. 45", "Night of the Juggler" and "The Exterminator", this film is like an anti-tourist campaign for the city of New York! Nothing you see here will ever make you want to go city-tripping in the Big Apple! The cast is full of unlikable people and many scenes play at raunchy, neon-lit districts. The horror action mostly takes place at a wannabe fancy hotel, the Royal Arms, where apparently unrelated residents turn up savagely murdered. The script desperately wants us to believe that the killer is the eccentric night porter / aspiring Broadway actor Vincent Hardwick, but I don't think anyone is gullible enough to believe he's the one. In spite of many flaws and too many boring parts, "Too Scared to Scream" is nonetheless enjoyable if you're a fan of eighties slashers and/or the above-mentioned exploitation sub-genres.

Great little 80s slacker flick with many nods to Psycho. No cheese so it may get a little dry at times for the standard slasher fanatic, but if you can stand a more serious type of horror, go for it. But make no mistake- this isn't art either.