Ninja the Final Duel

There is one all-important reason you should view this film: The Ninja Water Spider Attack Team! One of the most insane ideas ever to be recorded on celluloid: ninjas hopping about a lake on top of giant, rubber spiders! The other ninja teams're pretty good too, especially the dudes who dig super-fast under the ground. Also worth looking out for is the sequence where the fighters do their formation-marching in front of their leader: one pattern they assume is a swastika-shape, like something from "Springtime for Hitler"! Oh yeah, one more thing to watch out for: the totally naked girl fighter who likes to do high kicks! The original film/series that this footage comes from supposedly runs for hours and hours! Some more of this footage can be seen in Shaolin Dolemite.

NINJA: FINAL DUEL packs an awful lot of zany fun into its ninety minutes running time. With its naked kung fu chicks, water spider assault teams, jive-talking black monks, ninja swastika formations, cackling bad guys and long-eyebrowed Shaolin monks, this movie sounds like a dream-come-true for fans of trash cinema; but, thanks to a complete lack of a cohesive narrative, it ends up as something of a disappointment. Whilst I am the first to admit that a strong storyline isn't always a major requirement for a martial arts film, when a film feels as disjointed as NINJA: FINAL DUEL did, then I'm gonna start deducting points!

A team of nasty ninjas plot to take over China, but are defeated by the legendary monks of the Shaolin Temple. Disgraced, the ninja leader commits Hara-kiri. After this failure, another team of fighters is gathered together for a new attack.

After he is not picked for the new team of ninjas, talented fighter Wang Chi Chung travels to China to try to learn the secrets of Shaolin martial arts. When the evil ninjas finally launch their attack, Wang Chi Chung switches allegiance and uses his skills to help defeat the Japanese invaders.

Pieced together from footage excised from a TV series, NINJA: FINAL DUEL really feels like a 'Frankenstein's monster' of a film, leaping awkwardly from one scene to another and introducing new characters at the drop of a hat. A dreadful voice-over introduces viewers to the ninjas at the beginning of the film, explaining their methods of training, but after that we are on our own; I strongly suggest forgetting about following the story and just concentrate on enjoying the crazy happenings and impressive acrobatic fight scenes.

Better still, consume several pints of lager before watching; it can only improve your viewing experience.

A rather extreme example of screw loose Chinese film-making from the 1980's. An era where HK and Taiwanese films were fast-paced, illogical exercises in frenetic film making, this one really takes the cake and sits on it.

The plot is threadbare and indecipherable at the same time. The scenes unfurl to strike the film makers fancy not to move the story along. It's really clear that the people who made this didn't care if the legendary spider boats obviously don't work or that the film is set in some sort of time warp between the 1920's or the 1980's. The American monks seem to be parodies of the Hare Krishnas that used to plague the airports and the Black Monk of Harlem is inspired by "The Last Dragon" but everything else seems to set in old China. The digging ninjas are first shown struggling with their small shovels, then suddenly they are drilling thru the ground at 50 miles per hour. The producers of the film didn't take this seriously and neither should the viewer.

The unusual nude fight scene is the first example I've seen of Taiwanese film nude kung fu that I had heard about from a friend who lived in Taiwan in the late 1980's. He had collected a number of these films which were subsequently confiscated by HK customs when he came back. Apparently these scenes were the rage for a small time in Taiwan. My friend had actually acted in one film (as a stock white bad guy) where he had to fight a heroine who practiced "Iron Chest". You can guess how that was used. The scene in this film is more of a shock then good. Most of the nude part of the fight involves the actress being flung around while she tries to cover herself with a sheet. She finally starts to fight back but the choreography seems to have been designed to cause the most amount of jiggle instead of an effective fight scene. And the jiggle isn't that good either. Eventually the actress must have said "enough" and she is suddenly clothed in a two piece bikini she somehow creates from the single sheet. The next scene she is in, she is killed off. They probably couldn't afford her anymore.

Good for a laugh with a group of friends, that's it. Except for the nude fight even my wife enjoyed the film and she doesn't like kung fu films.

The kind of movie to watch on a Sunday morning! As a lover of oldschool kungfu movies, this is probably the best of the worst. Inflatable water spiders, kinetic thunderfists and tigerclaw warriors. What else do you need?!

Dec 22

Alexander Lo Rei stars in this fun fun fun Ninja film. It starts out with some Ninja training going on for 10 minutes or so, and this is worth the price of admission alone, some great fun scenes with great disguises, Ninjas walking up trees and giant inflatable spiders.

You also get Shaolin monks thrown in as well as 2 American wannabe monks and a couple of Japanese fighters that want to help the Shaolin Temple against the Ninjas.

It is a reel hoot, but it is a little let down by being a bit disjointed, characters just seems to disappear or appear in the next scene in a completely different scenerio to where they were before.

Ninja fun 8 out of 10.