The Transformers: The Movie

First of all, anyone who has left a negative comment on this movie has something wrong with them, seriously. I have no idea when I first saw this movie but I was about 6-ish. I'm now 22 and this is still a bloody awesome film. I have always been a big Transformers fan and I know I might seem a bit bias, but I own the movie on DVD and have shown it to a number of transformer illiterates, male and female, young and old and still the only people I know who have ever got a bit sick of it are my parents, as they have seen it about as many times as myself. Everything about this movie is excellent, from the new characters, to the fact that the autobots seem to suck at shooting anything ( as opposed to the usual 'bad guys can't shoot for doit'.) even down to what would be, if not for the movie it's in, one of the crappiest songs ever 'the touch', by the Loins I think. THE Battle, Primes death, the creation of Galvatron, the Junkbots, Sharkticons, Unicron, IT IS ALL GOLD!!!! Anyone who liked 80's cartoons should love this movie, and so should all your Kids, if not, I think it's time to go and get checked out by your G.P.

The Transformers, the animated cartoon from the 1980's, was a typical cartoon: cheesy and childish, things we would not recognize until we were grown. But when Transformers: The Movie was released in 1986, when I was 11, the movie scared the hell out of me. But so did Superman and Star Wars, which was exactly its intention.

As when Batman came to the big screen in 1989, the filmmakers took something old and made it new again. In the case of the Transformers, the movie was dark, loud, and very adult considering the fact that it springs from what was another silly fad the children of the 80's latched onto.

I don't know how people older and younger than I will perceive it, but the film is Shakespearean in its beauty. The 1980's soundtrack works surprisingly well, even now, unlike other 80's attempts, like, say Heavy Metal.

The movie picks up in 2005, or about 20 years after the cartoon supposedly took place. Young Spike is now older and has a child of his own, and all the Autobots and Decepticons are back, with some new faces. In the opening moments, Unicron (Orson Welles), destroyer of worlds, eats a planet of peace-loving people (supposdely robots, but still eerily reminiscent of our Earth populi), killing millions. Decepticons don't just plot against the Autobots-- they murder them in cold blood (er, oil?)

This is the equivalent of the X-Files movie getting made, and Cigarette Smoking Man getting to use dirty words. It is a true expansion to the big screen, an intelligent version of the TV show, made not to pander to their audience, but to elevate it.

This movie is impossible to find in the States, but if you ever watched the TV show, it will bring you to a new level. If you've never heard of the TV show... it's still a great Anime-yarn, and a helluva lot better than that X-Files flick.

As a kid in the 80s this was probably the coolest and most awesome movie ever. As an adult in 2023 with few previous experiences with the Transformers franchise this movie is just campy 80s action, and it is a blast. This movie is like 80 minutes long, and at least 60 of those minutes are giant robots fighting in space and you can only go so wrong with that. The voice acting is over the top in the best way, and there's a lot of talent including Casey Kasem, Frank Weller, Scattman Cruthers, and Orson Welles. Having no knowledge of Transformers, I didn't know any of the characters names except for Optimus, Megatron, and Starscream for some reason and I didn't know or care what the story was because I was just having a ton of fun. Also the soundtrack is awesome, filled with sick 80s songs and badass instrumentals. Both times The Touch came on I was grinning ear to ear, easily one of the most underrated movie songs ever.

I'm biased. There's no two ways about it. They could have gotten two six years olds to draw the cels, a troop of monkeys to write the dialogue and then printed the film upside down and full of static and I'd still have loved it (if anybody out there says 'Didn't they do that anyway?', I'll thump them.) I am one of a dying but suprisingly populous breed: the Tranformers fan, and to me this film is like the Holy grail.

If you think I'm going to get all gooey and teary-eyed then go into nostalgia overload then forget it because I'm not. I say this with a straight face and a critic's eyes: this is a good film. It may be a two hour toy commercial. It may have made zip at the box offce. It may get bad press from idiotic fossils that just aren't prepared to make the effort to tap into the universe the film is set in. But the fact remains that to anybody that's grown up with Transformers, this film is marvelous. Why? Because it does it right! The characters act right. The style is right. It's all done so perfectly that no right minded Transfan could possibly complain. How many Batman fans (and I mean real Batman fans) can honestly say the same thing about their film franchise.

It's easy to get preachy about the violence in a film aimed at kids. It gives the moral majority something to do other than examine each Disney film for subliminal messages. I found it refreshing to actually see this kind of film refuse to pull its punches. It's an action film without tapping into the over-sentimental gushy stuff that usually turns kids off anyway. This is a war. Death and violence are part of it. Will it effect the children that watch it. Maybe, but I don't know which way. I saw first saw the film when I was 7. I saw all of my favourites get blown apart. I saw my absolute, total, complete and utter hero, the person that personified all that was good and noble to me (you know who I mean) get killed saving his friends in an ultimate display of bravery and courage. I cried. My mum cried. I still do. I think that one moment made me more afraid and ashamed of death and destruction than a dozen Private Ryans.

The animation is top notch, there's an amazing soundtrack and the voice talent is good too. Not perfect, but Nimoy's portrayal of Galvatron is incredible. Espicially when you consider that it was probably done as a 'For the money not the art' job. The script isn't bad either. It has a host of sharp, quotable one-liners that would put Bruce Willis to shame ("I've got better things to do tonight than die.") The story is a rip off of Star Wars but what isn't and who cares? It's cool. The animation is superb. I said that earlier but I really do believe that it's better than Disney at some points. Certainly better than the average output at the time. It doesn't compare with today's graphics but it hasn't aged badly at all. The sountrack can sound a little too cheesy at times but the energy and verve of the film is there and it backs up the visuals with ease.

In the end it won't matter. This film won't mean a thing to anybody that doesn't know who Jazz, Bumblebee and Soundwave were to begin with. They won't watch it. They won't like it. And you know what? We don't care. Those of us that can name all five mebers of the Stunticons know better. They gave us what we wanted. And we remain eternally grateful.

The release of Bay and Spielberg's megablockbuster is the ideal time to look back on "Transformers: the movie", the original (and animated) big-screen adventure of the famous toy. This feature was commissioned to revamp the product, and kill off many of the original characters in order to introduce new ones. It sees the Autobot/Decepticon war take a backseat to a global war of survival against planet eater Unicorn (voiced by Orson Welles).

Surprisingly enough, there is a lot worth mentioning in this film, both good and bad.

On the minus side, of course, the predominantly 80s soundtrack has aged quite horrendously and some new characters are less appealing than they should be, chiefly the dinobots whose "comic relief" is neither comical nor relieving. The ending also feels rushed, which is a shame since such a fast-paced and action-packed film as this could have used a calmer denouement.

On the plus side, though you can fault the film's purely commercial objective, you can only admire its inventiveness. Unicorn is a beauty, both in design and in how the creature is used. The opening planet destroying scene is abrupt, savage and hugely impressive, even 20 years later. Optimus Prime is used to maximum effect, as is the whole Megatron/Galvatron storyline. The fast pacing and varied locals are the real strength though, since our heroes run from planet to planet and bump into intriguing (and often disturbing) creations, such as the genocidal Quintessons. The film's laudable level of violence is probably a key component of its enduring appeal.

All in all, one can only hope that at least a few of the many neat ideas explored here will find their way into the sequel to 2007's live action version.

This may not be Shakespeare, but to an extent, it is worthy of its minor cult following. A more than adequate 85 minutes with touches of bizarre genius.