And God Created Woman

...or at least gorgeous. I only watched the movie to see her. Did I say she was really beautiful and amazing? Otherwise, the movie was frightful. It was not a good way to lose an hour and a half of my life. Rambling, pointless and poorly developed, this story did not need to be told. A remake of a bad Bardot movie. Shame on the director.

One thing I've always admired about 80's movies is that they all have that "Miami Vice look". The groundbreaking show featured hip clothing for the time as well as lots of music playing (hits or otherwise) when there was no dialogue. Today, we don't have that in films or T.V., but in the last great decade, it was everywhere. I've wondered if there ever was a true 90's movie?

And God Created Woman continues this trend. This film was made during the "hip" trend of the late 80's, when people gave up their feathered mullets and ugly tank-tops and started wearing the suits, hats, and skinny ties that were in style. The ladies would wear acid-wash jeans and what-not.

This story is a different version of the original Bardot film that made Roger Vadim a star. In this one, Rebecca De Mornay plays Robin Shea, a convict who wants to make it big as a rock 'n roll star. However, she is doing time for something and she has to wait for her parole. The story that unfolds is the kind of unbelievable pap that came out in the 50's but is set in the 80's. It's just a fairy tale. The story is too mundane to even explain, because you've seen it before.

I will say that the acting is mediocre at best. Only Vincent Spano, who plays a decent guy who ends up in cahoots with De Mornay delivers a good performance. Frank Langella sleepwalks his way through his role as a prospective candidate for the governship of New Mexico who also gets involved with De Mornay. De Mornay herself is very cute, but plays a rogue who nobody would approve of. Everyone else is just a cardboard extra. The soundtrack is decent (all movies came out with a soundtrack, it seemed). All in all, not good, but better than the crap coming out today, I guess.

Probably one of the worst movies of the 1980's, 'And God Created Woman' stars Rebecca De Mornay as Robin, a prison inmate who convinces the prison handyman (Spano) to marry her for a large sum of money so she can get released on parole. When she's out, they move in together and don't get along. Robin starts a rock-band, hoping to fulfill her life long dreams of becoming famous. Soon Robin catches the eye of local senator James Tiernan, and they eventually have an affair. As Robin's new found freedom is put in jeopardy, she must do whatever she can to remain free, while not hurting the man she really loves.

If there was ever a movie looking for a point, this is it. The movie has no direction, it wants to be too many things and ends up nowhere. There are prison breaks, gratuitous sex, family squabbles, political banquets, and rock bands. The writing in this is so over the top I had a hard time figuring out if this movie was intended as a drama or a comedy.

Hack director Roger Vadim, remaking his own 1956 film of the same name, had hoped this might do for De Morney what the original film did for famous sex symbol Brigitte Bardot, but the film turned out to be a box-office dud, and she'd have to wait a few more years before her chilling performance in 'The Hand That Rocks the Cradle' finally saw her deservedly hit the big time.

Robin Shea (Rebecca De Mornay) escapes from a New Mexico prison. She hitches a ride with James Tiernan (Frank Langella) who is running for governor. It turns out he's visiting the prison and he tells her to sneak back in. She runs into carpenter Billy Moran (Vincent Spano) who helps her and has sex with her. She calls up Tiernan who tells her to get marry for a better chance at parole. She offers $5k to Moran to marry her. She gets parole and moves in with him who lives with his son Timmy and his brother Peter. The usual relationship struggles.

This is notable for director Roger Vadim revisiting his iconic creation. It starts like an erotic B-movie with a naked De Mornay and women's prison. Then it become awkward with an angry Billy Moran. There is so much cheese that it is irredeemably bad. Even the rock music playing is cheesy. Robin Shea is not a compelling character and I don't like their relationship. There is very little appealing about this movie.

I sat down to watch "And God Created Woman" because I used to enjoy Rebecca De Monay's movies when I was younger, but I never got around to watching this movie from 1988 before late in 2016.

I must admit that I didn't have much expectations to it, as I had no idea what this movie was about, and it is a 1980s movie after all. And the movie didn't turn out to be anything extraordinary.

Sure, there were some good and fun enough moments throughout the course of the movie, but in overall, then this was just a less than mediocre movie in terms of entertainment value.

It was nice to see Frank Langella in the movie, but he could only do so much to salvage the movie, as there was very little to work with in terms of story and plot. As for Rebecca De Mornay, then this was nowhere near being her best movie performances. I am sure it might have been something back in the day, since there is a heap of nudity throughout the course of the movie.

What failed to work for me was the characters in the movie, because they just never took a hold. The characters in the story were little more than just cardboard cut-outs with very little characteristics, personality and depth. Which ultimately permeated a sense of shallowness to the movie.

The storyline was not really a plausible one either. I mean, a guy who marries a woman in jail that he doesn't even know so that she can get out, just doesn't really cut it. And to top things off, then things throughout the course of the story were so predictable that you saw it coming a mile away.

"And God Created Woman" had remained to stay unseen by me for 28 years, and I can't claim to have stumbled upon a hidden gem here. I have seen it now, and can honestly say that I am not going to return to watch it a second time around.