Grizzly II: Revenge

...is so obviously hilariously NOT from the original 1983 footage. (For those that care, they're called The Dayz and have an Instagram page; kudos to them for being one of a BILLION bands to be randomly selected for a very hyped cult film release! Perhaps they know the producer??) It's obviously a modern day band (the sound is different, they didn't even ATTEMPT to make it sound like a live performance), the hair styles and clothes are different (a man bun? A dude in a backwards baseball cap and a shirt that says GREENPOINT?? In 1983 when no one outside Brooklyn had even heard of Greenpoint??) and the footage of them playing is clearly not at a concert! They're playing in a studio or perhaps warehouse. Furthermore they keep using the SAME shots (guy on saxophone! Female member headbang in slow motion), with quick cut aways to wide shots of the actual 1983 live audience in hopes you won't notice. Well, we did!

Greetings again from the darkness. The slate of movies I review each year leans heavily towards serious and dramatic material, but is there anything more serious than an 18 foot tall grizzly bear seeking revenge for the poaching of her cubs? And is there a better springboard to success for actors than the sequel to a cheesy land-based riff on JAWS? OK, I sense your skepticism. What if I told you that sequel featured three Oscar winners, and the original was one of the most profitable ROI films of the year? Starting to come around, aren't you?

Well, before you get overly excited in anticipation of this film's release, please allow me to explain ... or come clean. This 1983 film has its own special place in cult film lore. Some even doubted its existence (or at least the actual title). But now, after all these years and rumors, the legend comes to life, and has not only been "completed", but is getting a semblance of release. If you love schlock horror where nature-goes-awry, with the added bonus of 'spot the actor' (now almost 40 years older), then there is the possibility you are worthy of watching this ... this ... abomination (meant here as a term of endearment).

You should know that there are very few sightings of the enormous grizzly bear; although we do get an opening sequence with some quality camera work featuring grizzlies in the wild. Even though we don't see much of the titular beast, she does dominate the story. The earliest sequence features three young campers ignoring bear warning signs. These three campers are why we are all here. A pre-"E/R" George Clooney (21 years old) sports a denim vest before climbing in a sleeping bag with a partially clothed 16 year old Laura Dern, who has somehow managed to complete the hike wearing sandals and whining the entire time. The third wheel is played by a 17 year old with hair hanging in his eyes and acne on his face. You'll recognize him as Charlie Sheen, although here he looks very much like brother Emilio. If you show up for this trio, hold off on the potty break, because there's an angry grizzly lurking.

There are other pieces to the story ... and I use 'pieces' in a manner similar to what one sees in an intersection after a couple of cars collide. A group of drunk poachers roam the woods looking to collect grizzly gall bladders, which evidently have value on the black market. The Park Rangers are preparing for an upcoming rock concert where 100,000 attendees are expected. A concert promoter played by Louise Fletcher (an Oscar winner as Nurse Ratched in ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST, 1975) bullies the newest Park Ranger played by Steve Inwood (who also appeared in STAYING ALIVE that same year, reaching world class clunker status twice in 1983) into "the show must go on" despite the grizzly killings.

This was director Andre Szots' second and final feature film as a director, though he did have a career as a producer. The husband and wife writing team of David Sheldon and Joan McCall 'crafted' the screenplay. He was also a co-writer on the original GRIZZLY (1976), while she appeared on screen in it. Continuing our game of 'spot the actor', we can't help but notice Deborah Foreman as the lead Ranger's wide-eyed daughter. Ms. Foreman was a very popular actor in the 1980's, including a starring role in VALLEY GIRL (1983). Unfortunately her career never hit the heights many predicted, although she does have one of the best lines in this film when she proudly states her skill at working a phone - both dial and push-button! Fans of either the "Lord of the Rings" or "Indiana Jones" franchises will surely get a kick out of John Rhys-Davies as a lumberjack-American Indian, who is renowned for his expertise in hunting "the devil bear". Other familiar faces include a young Timothy Spall (MR TURNER), Deborah Raffin (rumored to be the second choice for Sandy in GREASE), Ian McNiece (ACE VENTURA: WHEN NATURE CALLS, 1995), Dick Anthony Williams (a hard-working actor from the 1970's until his death in 2012), Jack Starratt (actor in FIRST BLOOD, 1982, director of RACE WITH THE DEVIL, 1975), and Charles Cyphers, who played the Indians' General Manager in MAJOR LEAGUE (1989).

The joy in seeing these folks in one place is compromised (to say the least) by the horrendous 1980's pop music being performed by those on stage attired in just about any outrageous 80's fashion you can recall. Initially comical, the musical acts quickly evolve into something stomach-churning to watch. The kindest description of the production quality is "low-budget", but there is simply no term for the effects. A Darth Vader breathing sound is heard when the grizzly is near, a speeding Ranger jeep on a dirt path is used to create suspense (the same shot is used multiple times), the day-night inconsistencies could be their own drinking game, and fireworks and a forklift prove to be a bad mix with our grizzly. Finally, for reasons we never really understand, a US Senator is a guest at the concert, and these days a Senator would likely be considered a greater threat than an 18 foot grizzly. You've heard the adage, "so bad it's good", well this one is simply so bad it's bad. William Girdler directed the original GRIZZLY in 1976, and he tragically died at age 30, just two years later. Available On Demand January 8, 2021

It is just bad. Has some big names well before they were big names, but it is so bad. Writing is terrible, editing is nonexistent, soundtrack is dismal, effects about as awful as low budget can get, and there's a concert amidst the movie- and I for the life of me don't know where they found people this bad.

Thankfully the movie is short and abruptly ends.

I read comments that there were problems with the animatronic 14" bear". That may be what techs were told in the US but there was NO such item. The 14 foot version was a puppet that was only intended to be used on the full sized stage and all those shots were completed before leaving Hungary. The half size animatronic version was complete and working prior to leaving Hungary too and we shot tests of it at that time. I had an agreement with Joe Proctor to direct the half size effects unit and all elements ( other than the man in a suit version which was almost complete) were finished and ready to shoot in coordination with the storyboard that I also supervised with artist Tony Beasley. The money dried up and the crew's PERSONAL equipment was seized by the Government who told us they were held against non payment of production bills. We never got our stuff out of there.

Grizzly II (1987)

Ahh, don't you just love lost movies? This sequel to William Girdler's 1976 cult favorite GRIZZLY was a Hungarian production that started filming in 1983 but for some reason it was never fully completed. Rumor has it that something illegal was done during the production and local authorities pretty much shut the film down. For nearly two-decades this film was surrounding in quite a myth as many believed it was never actually filmed while others thought they simply ran out of money and couldn't complete it. Then around 2005 or so, a workprint turned up and thankfully the majority of the film was complete. Being a killer grizzly film I guess it's fitting that the only thing actually missing are the bear attacks. Apparently the producers were going to film everything involving the bear in the final weeks of production so this never happened. The rest of the movie is pretty much complete but whenever something with a bear is about to happen the footage is simply missing. You still see the people attacked but there's just no actual footage of the bear doing it. With that said, if GRIZZLY II were to be released, completed or not, it would become an instant cult classic. Hell, it already is even with the missing footage. Let see what all this film has to offer:

* Academy Award winner Louise Fletcher.

* Deborah Raffin from DEATH WISH 3.

* John Rhys-Davies from the Indiana Jones series.

* Charles Cyphers from HALLOWEEN.

* Deborah Foreman of VALLEY GIRL.

* A soundtrack that illegally uses countless Michael Jackson songs.

* GRIZZLY star Christopher George was signed to play the lead but died of a heart attack shortly before production.

Wait there's one more big thing.......

* George Clooney, Charlie Sheen and Laura Dern in the same scene together.

GRIZZLY II has a, what else, grizzly eating people just as a State Park is about to hold a major concert. The owner (Fletcher) refuses to alert the media about the bear fearing it won't sell tickets so she demands the lid be put on it. Soon enough a group of rednecks (led by Cyphers) are trying to track down the bear while innocent campers (Clooney, Sheen, Dern) are eaten alive. Unfinished or not, GRIZZLY II is a must see for fans of bad cinema or just those who enjoy the "nature attacks" genre. There's so much wackiness in this movie that it really does seem as if you're watching about twenty-different campy movies rolled into one. You can start with the god-awful "concert" footage, which actually takes up a very big portion of the running time. The music is so awful that you can't help but have a good time with it and even though you'll want to cover your ears you just can't simply because of how funny it is. The men dancing around in tight shorts isn't any better and the silly redneck hunters are just downright crazy. There's one hilarious scene where one of the hunter's loses his brother to the bear and the only thing his buddies can do is tell him to just forget about it so they can go make money. More campiness arrives when the big three are out campy. Dern does a striptease for Clooney who is in a sleeping bad. The scene has them both cuddling in the bag when they're attacked by the bear. Just watch how Clooney appears more interesting in touching Dern than actually fighting the bear. This is followed up by Sheen getting attacked and just wait until you hear that scream of his, which has to be one of the worst in film history. There are so many campy moments in this film that you really can't help but just sit back and enjoy them. It's really too bad that the film was never completed but looking at the movie it probably wouldn't take too much money or time to fill in the missing pieces. The attack sequences really wouldn't take that long to film and when you see how many known stars are in the movie you can't help but think they'd have a terrific selling point. GRIZZLY II, so far, remains unreleased and it's a real shame because camp fans would have another classic to add to their library.