Renée Lippin credited as playing...
- Ceil: Don't you wanna hit the hot spots and drink Champagne from my slipper?
- Abe: I can't take that much liquid.
- Ceil: Abe, have you seen mama's teeth. She left them in a glass of water yesterday, and she can't find them.
- Abe: Kids were playing hockey with them.
- Ceil: They were playing hockey with mama's teeth?
- Abe: Yeah, the're about the same size as a puck.
- Ceil: Oh, Abe, how come you never take me to the Copacabana or El Morocco?
- Abe: Take the gas pipe.
- Ceil: I suppose you would have been happier married to Rita Hayworth.
- Abe: You gotta ask?
- Ceil: Believe me, Abe, those show business celebrities get divorced every six weeks, but we're together forever.
- Abe: I may take the gas pipe.
- Narrator: Ceil adored a very prominent ventriloquist, and this always used to drive Abe crazy:
- Abe: He's a ventriloquist on the radio - how do you know he's not moving his lips?
- Ceil: Who cares? Leave me alone!
- [bursts with laughter]
- Abe: Only creeps and crazy people go out on new year's eve.
- Ceil: Then you should definitely go out, Abe.
- Ceil: Just once, I'd like to eat at the Stork Club.
- Abe: They don't take Jews in the Stork Club. No Jews, no colored.
- Ceil: Abe, this is the United States of America.
- Ceil: All right, all right. Don't get your bowels in an uproar.
- Ceil: French fries? You ate French fries? You won't eat my French fries but you'll eat the Russian's, the commie's French fries?
- Mother: I'm gonna get him some bicarbonate.
- Ceil: That's too good for him. He deserves an enema!
- Abe: Oh, Ceil.
- Ceil: Yeah, right.
