Zelly and Me

The director did understood the work of heart. She brought both good and bad sides of human beings to the screen and show us how to live strongly in this world. Isbella Rossellini did her great job of being the best nanny ever. She made us believe in love and mercy that we almost think they were lost on the way to the modern world. I also fell in love with the girl in the story. She reminded me of the day when I was young.

I watched this movie once, but to me it's so sad. A strict grandmother who's only duty is to prevent her grandaughter from being rebellious like the girl's mother, never seems to provide enough love for her. When Zelly notices Phoebe burnt herself, CoCo fires Zelly, and pushes Phoebe into her parents bedroom because "she's now a big girl" and throws Phoebe's toys including her Teddy bear away. Zelly tries to rescue Phoebe, but at the last minute she and her boyfriend who attempted to kidnap knows it's wrong, and sends her back. Phoebe, must face the fact of living with her strict Grandmother, and with a pair of white socks makes a doll for herself. I do see some good parts in this movie, but it's way too sad for me to watch.

I saw this when I was a youngster (8 or 9) on HBO way back in the late 1980s or early 90s. I was fascinated by what I was seeing. I felt for her, I didn't know why. I related to her situation, but I couldn't understand why. It wasn't until rewatching it much later in my life that i realized what was actually happening to that poor girl. Her grandmother would only dish out love for Phoebe when phoebe was in full compliance with her grandmothers wishes meanwhile her nanny, Zelly loved her unconditionally. Hence the tagline. "Zelly never made me choose between being loved and being me." Her emotions are in a rollercoaster of conflict between her two gaurdians. Which made me understand that I had a similar upbringing. My parents only gave me loving attention when they saw what they wanted from me and not who I was becoming. I understand this cannot be compared to children who suffered worse childhood trauma but this kind of treatment plays a factor on your mental health. This is how trust issues arise later in life, how one can become over attached to a superficial relationship, etc. And how you wonder why a child would come to harm themselves when they don't feel loved. In that kind of situation, feeling pain the same way one of you childhood hero's went through might be better than feeling nothing at all from someone who is supposed to love you unconditionally.

I wish this film was more recognized and had a wider audience. It's a shame it's not on dvd or bluray. I feel like this is a more important film to watch as a child of the same age as the main character Phoebe. The pain you see on screen is very real. It's deep emotional pain and that can shape you or harm you later in life. It did me.

If you can watch or find this movie I highly recommend it. Whether you endured similar circumstances or not, this will help you understand that that kind of mistreatment as child, even if adults like to say "this is nothing compared to-". This stuff hurts.

This film is simply written & performed, I remember this when I was a kid, I truly felt the characters feelings play out on screen.

I watched this movie in 1990 and I was just 14 years old but through the years this movie enters my mind. I tried to find it once before but couldn't find it. I'm curious to see it now that I am older. It was always a sad movie to me.