Deep Blood

Compared to the mass of shark movies, this one is not very different from many others.

From the start of the movie to it's end, a lot of scenes are so generic that they could occur in every other shark movie. You could probably cut out some scenes and exchange them, not many would notice. The story is standard, the effects are below average, the music is boring to annoying.

What really hurts is the amount of useless scenes in this film, nobody needs. Diving down and planting dynamite over and over again feels trashy and I don't understand how somebody can watch this and say "Yes, we need to see him plant three more dynamite packs".

Another really annoying fact is how you can see the back of the pool in some of the shark scenes. Come on, everybody has to spot this.

This is the worst italian movie ever, quite possibly the worst movie of all time! Joe D'Amato is of course no cinematic genius but many of his movies are interesting and watchable. Unfortunatly this is not one of them. Its cheesy and boring....waaaaay boring. If you want a movie to MST3k, get Troll 2, if you want a movie to put someone into a coma, get deep blood!

There was a time, not even all that long ago if I remember correctly, that the notorious "Jaws: The Revenge" – the fourth installment in the world's most famous shark franchise, was listed here in the IMDb bottom 100. Admittedly this film isn't the elite of shark-movies but, trust me, it's a bona fide masterpiece in comparison to this shameless Italian piece of junk from the dirty hands of Joe d'Amato. "Deep Blood" – even the title is ridiculous – is a "Jaws" imitation that is at least 8-10 years overdue. The Italian shark movies from the early 80's are (for example "Great White" and "Devilfish") are also of questionable quality, but at least they're amusing and over-the-top cheesy! "Deep Blood" on that other hand is utterly boring and even too cheap to feature cheesy special effects. The only sharks that we get to see previously featured in National Graphic documentaries of which Joe d'Amato bought the stock footage! The wraparound story is also completely retarded. A bunch of young idiots living in a small and insignificant beach community take an oath to remain best friends for life and look after each other. Aw, how cute. Their buddy pact is immediately put to a severe test when one of them gets eaten by a shark. At least that's what you have to assume happened, because the actor simply vanishes in the water and the next shot just shows a puddle of red liquid instead. Either way, the rest of the losers decide to go shark hunting themselves, obviously against the will of local authorities. "Deep Blood" is a dreadfully tedious and overlong snoozer without any sort of memorable highlight… Except maybe if you count the boys' inability to estimate what quantity of dynamite is required to blow up a shark. There isn't even any gratuitous nudity or sleaze in this garbage. I'm really disappointed, Mr. d'Amato!

Deep Blood (1989)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Joe D'Amato's next to last horror film is yet another Italian rip off of Jaws. After a group of friends take a blood pack, their friendship is put to the test when one of them is eaten by a shark. This is without question the worst of the Italian rips I've seen but I do have two more coming to me. The film has one suspenseful moment, the first attack, but after that everything is pretty dull. There's not a fake shark used throughout the film. Instead we get stock footage of a real shark that naturally never matches up to watch we're seeing in the other footage. Since no fake shark is being used, all of the attacks are rather silly.

I like to think of myself as a bad movie connoisseur. I like to think that the films most people label as the worst of all time I can easily withstand.

But...there are exceptions. I can only recall three movies I have had the misfortune to see that I have repeatedly used the fast-forward button for large chunks of the story. Those movies are The Mighty Gorga, Night of the Seagulls, and this little crap, Deep Blood.

In the world of Jaws ripoffs, this falls off the scale. Deep Blood doesn't have the realistic storyline of the original Crocodile, nor the incredible effects of The Sea Serpent, nor the commentary of Tintorera. No, instead we are treated to a handful of teens from any random failed '80s public access sitcom battling bullies and the local sheriff.

Shark attacks are realized by quick cuts of documentary footage with actors thrashing about in the water, occasionally with a bit of what appears to be orange-ish paint thrown into the water. Not a minute of original shark footage exists in this celluloid waste dump.

Normally, I, or somebody like me, would read a dismal review like this one and say "cool, I gotta find a copy of this!" That's the same thought I had when I read another viewer's review on this very site. How wrong I was.

So...from one bad movie fan to another...let this collect dust on the shelf...grab Up From the Depths or The Great Alligator instead to satisfy your need for something evil lurking in the water.