In the Cold of the Night

Probably one of the worst films I have seen. The lead actor is a joke. He should be ashamed that this piece of "work" is in circulation. Not to mention a waste of money.

HANDSOME, blonde, romantic-at-heart, pizza-loving, thirtysomething LA photographer (with own neon sign) who specialises in swimwear shoots looking for the girl of his (murderous) dreams. Ride on over and surprise me.

Part 80s lingerie catalogue, part foreigner's Cali love letter, In the Cold of the Night probably isn't what most film buffs consider good cinema... yet, it's got everything that makes cinema good... for the right audience.

Greece's one-man-movie-machine Nico Mastorakis (had his hits and misses, but you can't say he's unambitious), made this along with a bunch of straight-to-video genre flicks in the late 80s-early 90s. For me, it's his most accomplished thriller.

A Skinemax, De Palma and Hitchcock homage (it even STARS Tippi Hedren!), it's filled with 80s style (satin sheets: check, nouvelle cuisine: check, neon bikinis: check, men's short-shorts and Reeboks: check, Venice Beach, Laserdisc... you get the idea). If you love Brian De Palma at his most indulgent (think Femme Fatale or Passion) and late-80s Italian giallo (Nothing Underneath or Too Beautiful to Die), how could you dislike this?

It even features the decade's underused icon Brian Thompson in his usual 'hunk-with-the-one-liners' role ("you ever get the desire to make it with your mother?") who looks fresh off Fright Night II. Shannon Tweed's here, too (in the waterbed), giving a surprisingly tender performance.

Adrienne Sachs (1986's Miss Brazil), looking every bit the high fashion model, takes the Deborah Shelton-in-Body Double role and carries the sexy, mysterious female lead fairly well. Jeff Lester, coming across as the poster-boy from a menswear catalogue, is likeable but wooden as the photographer weekend sleuth.

While it never manages De Palma's flair, is light on story development and lags in the middle, it's still entertaining enough to warrant a great night in - if you're a fan of the erotic thriller and want one which makes a good stab at actually being a thriller.

Make sure you've got 80s cocktails, are appropriately (under)dressed and have a camera watching over you when you go to sleep.

Like an iconic motorcycle, it's stylish and flashy but hard to maintain (although it's a great ride).

I think Doppleganger (1993), by Israel's Avi Nesher (a man whose career is somewhat similar to Mastorakis) shares a lot of this flick's lets-go-to-town DNA.

This one's a hot, hot mess. There's no denying that much of the cinematography is well done and there are some visually compelling moments.

But truly, this is a terrible movie. The dialogue/script is overblown and comical. I'm a big fan of trash cinema but I'm really hard pressed to recall a movie that took itself so seriously but was so cliched and vacuous as this is.

The acting veers wildly between wooden and dinner theater histrionics and there are zero sympathetic characters in it.

Amusing and there are some stupefyingly bad moments of dialogue that will have you howling with laughter. The positive reviews are really difficult to comprehend.

This is a slick erotic thriller with an interesting plot, lengthy sex scenes that will appeal to both men and women, and a few amusing references to Brian De Palma and Hitchcock's "The Birds". Although it bogs down a little in the middle, and has some atrocious dialogue, it is still one of Mastorakis' best efforts (out of the handful I've seen). And it would perhaps be even better if the two main actresses had switched roles, with Shannon Tweed being the mysterious femme fatale instead, and Adrienne Sachs getting the thankless supporting part. (**1/2)

I only have one thing to say about this movie, and that is that the guy sleeps on a water bed with a fluorescent light *inside* the mattress!

Say what you will about the rest of the film, that alone is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen. No wonder the guy has nightmares.