Johnny Galecki credited as playing...
Rusty Griswold
- Clark: Russ, we checked every bulb, didn't we?
- Rusty Griswold: Oh, yeah. Yeah. I'm sure of it.
- Clark: I thought so. Well, maybe we ought to go up there and just get...
- Rusty Griswold: Oh, jeez! Look at the time. I gotta get to bed. Brush my teeth. Feed the hog. I've still got some homework to do. Do the laundry. Wash the car. I've still got those bills to pay...
- Rusty Griswold: Dad, this tree won't fit in our back yard.
- Clark: It's not going in the yard, Russ. It's going in the living room.
- Clark: Burn some dust here. Eat my rubber.
- Rusty Griswold: Dad, I think you mean burn rubber and eat my dust.
- Clark: Whatever, Russ. Whatever.
- Mr. Frank Shirley: I have never been treated like this in my life!
- Ellen: I'm sorry. This is our family's first kidnapping.
- Mr. Frank Shirley: [to Clark] You're fired! And where's the phone? I'm calling the police!
- Eddie: Now, just hold your wad there, fella. Clark had nothin' to do with this. This here, was my idea.
- Mr. Frank Shirley: All right, he's still fired. And, *you*, are going to jail!
- [Eddie scoffs in clear disbelief]
- Clark: No, no, Eddie. It was my fault. I lost my temper when I got my bonus and I guess I said a few thing I shouldn't have.
- Mr. Frank Shirley: Bonus? How did you get a bonus?
- [aggressively]
- Mr. Frank Shirley: I cut out bonuses this year!
- Clark: Well, thanks for telling us. I was expecting a check. Instead I got enrolled in a jelly club. Seventeen years with the company. I've gotten a Christmas bonus every year but this one. You don't want to give bonuses, fine! But when people count on them as their salary, well what you did just plain...
- Rusty Griswold: Sucky.
- Clark: Thanks, Russ. My cousin-in-law, whose heart is bigger than his brain...
- Clark: Appreciate that, Clark.
- Clark: Is innocent. I'll be more than happy to take the rap on this, on behalf of myself and every other employee you rear-ended this Christmas.
- [dramatic pause]
- Mr. Frank Shirley: Look uh, sometimes things look good on paper. But lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it you have to hurt the ones you depend on. It's people that make the difference. Little people like you. So... Clark, whatever you got last year... add
- [light pause]
- Mr. Frank Shirley: twenty percent.
- [the whole family gasps in relief, while Clark falls down]
- Clark: No, Eddie. It was my fault. I lost my temper when I got my bonus and I guess I said a few thing I shouldn't have.
- Mr. Frank Shirley: Bonus? How did you get a bonus? I cut out bonuses this year.
- Clark: Yeah. Thanks for telling us. I was expecting a check. Instead I got enrolled in a jelly club. 17 years with the company. I've gotten a Christmas bonus every year but this one. You don't want to give bonuses, fine. But when people count on them as their salary, well what you did just plain...
- Rusty Griswold: Sucks.
- Clark: Thank you, Russ. My cousin-in-law, whose heart is bigger than his brain...
- Eddie: Appreciate that, Clark.
- Clark: Is innocent. I'll be more than happy to take the rap on this, on behalf of myself and every other employee you rear-ended this Christmas.
- Mary: These are cut really high in the hip. Look, I'm wearing something similar. See, you can't see the line.
- Clark: Can't see the line, can you Russ?
- Rusty Griswold: Nope.
- [Clark stares at Rusty in shock]
- Clark: [Just veered into the left lane and got stuck under a log truck] We're alright! Thank God we're alright!
- Ellen: Clark, we're stuck under a truck!
- Clark: Do you honestly think I don't know that?
- Rusty Griswold: Come on you guys, don't fight!
- Clark: Oh for Christ's sake, I didn't do this on purpose!
- Ellen: [Praying] Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name, and forgive my husband, he knows not what he does.
- Clark: [Before swerving out] Amen!
- Rusty Griswold: You think you might be overdoing it, Dad?
- Clark: Russ, when was the last time I overdid anything?