Gor II

Most simply, these movies are proof that science fiction and fantasy have fallen completely.

From Asimov's foresight and Tolkien's epics... devolve this sexually awkward televised game of Dungeons and Dragons?! I am disappointed with the genre because of this film.

No plot, annoyingly hollow characters that never develop, horrible actors, and a poor concept from the beginning make this movie (and it's twin) worthless. Quite literally, Mother Goose's simplest tale has miles more to say about the world. While such a feat used to be hard for this genre, now it seems 9 year olds get novels published, and screenplays filmed.

It gets a second star simply for being so easy to heckle. The Mystery Science Theater 3000 version is more enjoyable, and illustrates my point beautifully. However, this episode is a little wasted if you don't watch with friends and heckle along too.

My review was written in March 1989 after watching the movie on Warner video cassette.

This followup shot in 1987 in southern Africa back-to-back with Cannon's "Gor" is a puerile adventure film. It's headed direct to video in the U. S. from Warners.

Handsome Italian star Urbano Barberini encores as the hero of John Norman's endless series of pulp novels, transported hokily to the planet of Gor in what plays like a daydream. With nerdy sidekick Russel Savadier and a helpful dwarf (Nighe Chipps) he battles gladiator-style against evil high priest Jack Palance, attempting to free the planet from slavery.

Ho-hum plot goes nowhere and beautiful heroine Rebecca Ferrati (a Playboy magazine graduate) is wasted. With no sci-fi or fantasy trappings, pic has only pretty views of the Namib desert to offer.

Ah, Gor. I really used to think Cave Dwellers was pretty crappy, but Outlaw of Gor makes me wish Ator could skewer Cabot while Thong pummels Watney Smith into submission. Having seen Outlaw several times, I must admit, it does tend to get better and you catch even more hilarity. The strange thing is that the humor is so unintentional since the actors really play their roles so seriously! Also, add to the fact that Outlaw is preceded by Gor which makes following the plot (what plot??) a difficult task indeed.

Jack Palance really looks annoyed in almost every scene he's in. Maybe it's those really goofy hats he wears and his facial expression which says "I have more talent in my pinky fingernail than all these scum actors combined." Urbano is less than mediocre as Cabot, but is less painful to watch than Russel Savadier's portrayal of sex starved Watney. Try not to regurgitate during his massages (EWW!). The barely clad nymphs in the film add a little (and I do stress little) enjoyment to the film especially the terrific acting of Donna Denton whose "Get out of here, you disgusting worm!" speech may be the highlight of the entire movie. That or any scene with Nigel "Kermit" Chipps.

There must've have been so many Seymour Butts jokes during the making of this film.

The only reason I actually sat through this entire movie is because I happened to be an extra in it and was curious to see myself on the big screen. They shot some of the scenes in South Africa, in and around an old mine dump just outside my home town (Benoni). As poor students, my buddy and I thought it would be a fun way to make extra money being extras in movies during vacations, and it kinda was. We made a load of spare cash too, since the movie makers were exploiting the currency exchange rate at the time and paid pretty well (for us at the time anyway).

Anyway, the movie was laughable, and even during filming I could tell that it was going to be. If you ever happen to see this movie, there is a fight scene where the hero kills his attacker with a big (wooden) sword by clearly stabbing the ground next to his chest. Do I need to say more?

No, not really. Possibly the most disturbing "buffalo shot" in cinematic history (the poor dwarf in the bearskin diaper bares all as he climbs down a building face.) Obviously I've only seen the MST version, but even that was hard going. It made for quite a funny episode, though. If it ever comes out on home video, check it out. Just avert your eyes when you see the dangling dwarf. ..