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Kevin Costner in Dances with Wolves (1990)

Maury Chaykin: Major Fambrough

Dances with Wolves

Maury Chaykin credited as playing...

Major Fambrough

Photos6

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Quotes3

  • Major Fambrough: Sir knight? I've just pissed in my pants... and nobody can do anything about it.
  • Major Fambrough: [barely audible] Lieutenant John J. Dunbar?
  • [louder]
  • Major Fambrough: Lieutenant John J. Dunbar?
  • John Dunbar: Yes, sir.
  • Major Fambrough: Yes, sir. Indian fighter, huh?
  • John Dunbar: Excuse me?
  • Major Fambrough: [reading orders] Well it says here that you're to be posted on the frontier. The frontier's Indian country. I quickly deduced that you're an Indian fighter. I did not ascend to this position by being stupid.
  • John Dunbar: No, sir.
  • Major Fambrough: No, sir. It says here that you've been decorated.
  • John Dunbar: Yes, sir.
  • Major Fambrough: [nods] And they sent you here to be posted?
  • John Dunbar: Actually sir, I'm here at my own request.
  • Major Fambrough: Really? Why?
  • John Dunbar: I've always wanted to see the frontier.
  • Major Fambrough: You want to see the frontier?
  • John Dunbar: Yes, sir. Before it's gone.
  • Major Fambrough: [smiles] Such a smart lad, coming straight to me.
  • [pulls a sheet of paper from his desk drawer and begins to write]
  • Major Fambrough: Sir Knight... I'm sending you on a knight's errand. You will report to Captain Cargill at the furthermost outpost of the realm... Fort Sedgewick. My personal seal will assure your safety through many miles of wild and hostile country.
  • [wads up the paper tightly and hands it to Dunbar]
  • John Dunbar: I was wondering...
  • Major Fambrough: Yes?
  • John Dunbar: I was wondering, sir... how will I be getting there?
  • Major Fambrough: [paranoid] You think I don't know?
  • John Dunbar: No, sir.
  • Major Fambrough: You think I don't know.
  • John Dunbar: No sir, it's just that I don't...
  • Major Fambrough: Hold your tongue! I just happen to be in a generous mood and I will grant you a boon. See that peasant out there?
  • [glances to window to Timmons standing outside]
  • Major Fambrough: He calls himself Timmons. He's going to your Fort Sedgewick this very afternoon... you can ride with him if you like. He knows the way. Thank you. That is all.
  • Major Fambrough: [Dunbar salutes Fambrough... he returns it halfheartedly. Dunbar turns to leave] Sir Knight?
  • [Dunbar turns back around to face him, Fambrough stands up]
  • Major Fambrough: I've just pissed in my pants, and nobody can do anything about it.
  • [Dunbar turns back around silently and leaves]
  • Major Fambrough: The king is dead...
  • [raises a pistol to his head]
  • Major Fambrough: Long live the king...
  • [pulls the trigger]

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