Million Dollar Legs

I found Million Dollar Legs to be one of the funniest films I've seen. I was unaware that it is available on video.I'm going to get myself a copy,and show it to my friends who appreciate satire and/or slapstick in the style of the Marx Bros.

There is room among movie aficionados to do a full study about "Ruritanian" Romances and films. Besides THE PRISONER OF ZENDA the number of films dealing with fictitious foreign states include musicals, comedies, and even straight political dramas. While all the studios put them out, Paramount certainly seemed to do more of them than the others. Look at THE LOVE PARADE, THE MERRY WIDOW, DUCK SOUP, and the present film, MILLION DOLLAR LEGS. Basically these countries have very poor populations ("Klopstokia" in MILLION DOLLAR LEGS is said to be basically made of nuts and goats; "Marshovia" in THE MERRY WIDOW, and "Freedonia" in DUCK SOUP depend on the largess of one rich woman in each country). The politics are not really democratic. "Sylvania" in THE LOVE PARADE is a monarchy, and has a particularly ruthless (if hapless) ambassador at work for it in DUCK SOUP. "Freedonia" in DUCK SOUP gives up democracy to satisfy a condition for a loan, and adopts an eccentric dictator (although a sharp one). And, although "Klopstokia" has a President, the election is based on physical strength - not on actual popular demand. Moreover W.C.Fields is as capricious in his way as Groucho Marx was in DUCK SOUP. Witness how Fields imagines a General he is dictating a letter to has insulted him, and breaks him to the rank of private.

It is a land of intrigue - for some incomprehensible reason Ben Turpin keeps turning up as a spy on the goings on of Fields and everyone else. The Vice President (Hugh Herbert - not quite so silly in this film as in others) keeps looking for ways of turning out the President either legally or by underhanded ways. When Klopstokia sends a large team of splendid athletes to the 1932 Los Angeles Olympics, Herbert hires the world's greatest vamp/spy - Mata Machree (Lyda Roberti) to demoralize and split up the team (and so discredit the President).

Fields is forced to rely on Migg Sweeney, a brush salesman (Jack Oakie) who is romancing Fields' daughter Angela (Susan Fleming) by singing the national love song, "Woof Blugle Gif" which is based on the tune of "One Hour With Your" from the Paramount film of the same name. He fortunately never gets to sing the entire song in the movie - he does play it on his ukulele. Migg manages, despite his fear for his safety from his prospective father-in-law, does do the best he can to keep the team in tack, and to try to bring it to Olympic gold.

The film is fast, as well as funny. I would give it an 8 out of 10.

W. C Fields is the hot tempered President of Klopstokia, an impoverished country where the Presidency is decided by arm wrestling matches. All Klopstokians have impossible athletic abilitites. This 1932 classic is a fun, wacked out laff riot. The writing is perfect. (Sample Fields dialog; "The Constitution forbids me to hit a man under 200 pounds." "I just had my lunch of roast goat stuffed with eel." Lyda Roberti is hysterical as Mata Macree, a Brooklyn accented femme fetale "Not too clozz boyzz, youse catch on fi-yer." 62 minutes of genius comedy.

Jack Oakie stars as an American brush salesman working in the tiny country of Klopstokia. He meets and fall in love with president W.C.Fields's daughter. He is rejected as a potential suitor until he convinces Fields that the nearly bankrupt country can get the money they need by sending a team to the Olympic games in Los Angeles. This seldom seen film is an absurdist masterpiece ... the slogan for Oakie's brush company is "They brush". Fields stays in office by defeating his cabinet in feats of strengths. This movie is the gift that keeps on giving.

First of all, bear in mind that this movie was made in 1932, not 2002. Then, do a little research into the popular media of the day, and you'll get the jokes a lot better. This is one of the funniest movies ever, and it is lightyears ahead of its time. The non-sequiturs (that means lines that don't make sense), the quick cuts, the topical humor - I just love it. What can you say about a country where all the men are named George, and all the women are named Angela? Why? Why not?? Let's take a few examples: do we all understand that it's the Fuller Brush Company that's being kidded in the first scene? Do you know about the terrorists of the day - the 'anarchists' - who were generally portrayed in black capes and hats, carrying daggers and pistols and those old fashioned bombs that look like cannon balls with fuses in them? Do you get the joke - Mata Machree? The image of the femme fatale Mata Hari, coupled with an old Irish song about Mom called "Mother Machree". Do we get that Lyda Roberti (who was Polish) is supposed to be Swedish, since Greta Garbo was the biggest star of the day? And the 'old Klopstockian Love Song' is sung to the tune of "One Hour with You," which was not only a popular film with, I believe, Maurice Chevalier, but was the theme song of the Eddie Cantor radio show, the most popular show of 1932? Movie audiences of the day would have gotten it.

Jack Oakie is perfect as the fast-talking brush salesman who saves Klopstockia. He is definitely a forerunner in style of not only Bob Hope, but of Robin Williams. Fields is hilarious, but so is everyone in this movie. Susan Fleming wasn't much of an actress, but she was beautiful. I just love Roberti, who came from a famous acting clan in Poland, and who died tragically young. She was a hoot, and could have had a memorable career. My favorite line of hers, when she does her hootchie kootchie dance to try to inspire Hugh Herbert to greater feats of strength: "I been done all I can do - in public." There are so many other quotable lines in this movie - it's the kind of movie you watch and recite along with the actors.

It helps to understand this movie to know a little something about what was 'in' in 1932, but it isn't absolutely necessary. The movie has enough funny lines and slapstick even by today's standards. It's also valuable as an example of the kind of editing we now take for granted. The kind of quick cutting and blackouts that we would see in, for example "Laugh-In," was rare in 1932. This was probably the first really screwball comedy, and it's the screwiest one of all.