Harry Davenport credited as playing...
Grandpa
- Agnes Smith: I can't get hungry till it gets dark.
- Katie (Maid): Dinner's at five-thirty. You can eat blind-folded!
- Mrs. Anna Smith: We have to be out of the dining room by six-thirty. Warren Sheffield is telephoning Rose, long distance from New York. And Rose, if I were you, I wouldn't committ myself one way or another. After all...
- Rose Smith: Mama, for goodness sakes!
- Mrs. Anna Smith: After all, we know very little about him. Why, we haven't even met his folks.
- Rose Smith: It seems to me. It seems to me that one little phone call is causing an awful lot of excitement in this family!
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Besides, you're entirely too young and I don't think your father will allow it.
- Katie (Maid): Mrs. Smith, if I have to keep lying to your daughters, I'll have to had more money.
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Now remember, you two: not a word of this to your papa. You know how he plagues the girls about their beaus.
- Agnes Smith: Everybody knows but Papa?
- Grandpa: Your papa's not supposed to know. It's enough we're letting him work hard every day to support the whole flock of us. He can't have everything.
- Warren Sheffield: Rose Smith, we can't go on like this any longer. I've positively decided we're going to get married at the earliest opportunity and I don't want to hear any arguments. That's final. I love you. Merry Christmas.
- Rose Smith: Merry Christmas
- Mr. Alonzo Smith: Anna, who is that boy?
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Now Lonny he's a very fine young man. We'll talk about it later.
- Grandpa: That young man is so excited he's liable to leave on his honeymoon without Rose.
- Grandpa: Pardon me, young man, but in the great country of China, when a stranger admires one of your possessions, it's common courtesy to offer it to him.
- Kid at the ball: That's very interesting...
- Grandpa: Yes. Well I spent many years in China, and if you want to make me feel thoroughly at home, you might offer me your partner.
- Kid at the ball: Huh?
- Grandpa: Spoken like a true gentleman.
- Agnes Smith: Rose, it's six-thirty and Warren hasn't called yet.
- 'Tootie' Smith: Maybe he found another girl.
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Quiet, you two.
- Rose Smith: Mama, I assure you that I'm not the slightest bit sensitive about Warren Sheffield.
- Grandpa: The queen has spoken.
- Lon Smith Jr.: I suppose Warren's too young, too. Every fellow I introduce her to is too young.
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Now, listen. Your papa will be down in a minute, and if we all eat quickly, we may still get out of here before the call comes through.
- Esther Smith: Warren is twenty-one and I think that's a perfect age.
- Rose Smith: He's practically a child.
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Your father was twenty when we were married.
- Grandpa: We gave him the bachelor dinner the night before. He almost missed the wedding!
- Grandpa: [moaning] Ohhhhhhh.
- Katie (Maid): What was that?
- Grandpa: Here are your sacks of flour.
- [Hand them to Tootie and Agnes]
- Grandpa: You couldn't get me out on a night like this for a million dollars!
- Agnes Smith: Did anyone here a noise just now?
- Grandpa: Did it sound like this?
- [moans again]
- Grandpa: Ohhhhhh?
- Agnes Smith: Uh-huh.
- Grandpa: [Shakes his head] I didn't hear it.
- Grandpa: If you wet the flour before you throw it, it makes it harder for the victim to remove it.
- Warren Sheffield: [on the telephone with Rose] Wait, Rose! We still have... 36 more seconds!
- Rose Smith: I have an engagement. I think I can hear Joe's voice, now.
- Grandpa: [lifts the tablecloth and looks under the table] Good evening, Joe!
- Agnes Smith: [Giggles] Roses are red, John's name is Truett, Esther's in love, We always knew it!
- Grandpa: Truett... Knew it... That's good. But I can't think of anything that rhymes with "Colonel" if it isn't "Infernal."
- Grandpa: That doctor must be walking.
- Rose Smith: Should I call Papa at the office?
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Oh, good heavens no, don't call your father! What could he do? There, there, darling.
- 'Tootie' Smith: He tried to kill me...
- Mrs. Anna Smith: Now, tell mama. What happened?
- Esther Smith: It was the streetcar. I think it hit her.
- Rose Smith: It must have knocked her onto the sidewalk, didn't it, Tootie?
- 'Tootie' Smith: No, it wasn't a streetcar. It was John Truett. He tried to kill me.
- Esther Smith: John Truett?
- Mrs. Anna Smith: John Truett hit you?
- 'Tootie' Smith: He tried to kill me, and when I screamed, he ran away.
- Esther Smith: Tootie Smith, that's a monstrous falsehood. John Truett wouldn't hit a girl, at least of all my sister.