Legend of the Mummy

_Legend of the Mummy_ was long and tedious... a few mildly suspenseful scenes and not much else. Al from _Home Improvement_ provided a little comic relief, but there was nothing at all in this flick which so much as made me want to stop it before going for a snack. And the mummy is incredibly cheesy, looking rather like Eddie, Iron Maiden's concert mascot.

This film is another low budget version of Bram Stoker's Jewel of the Seven Stars previously filmed as Blood From The Mummy's Tomb by Hammer in 1971. Trivia fans will care to note that deranged character actor Aubrey Morris, who appears as the doctor, played exactly the same role in the Hammer version.

It's pretty poorly acted and scripted and Amy Locaine can't hold a handle to the wonderful Valerie Leon in terms of physical presence. The ending is extremely confused and very bathetic - just as you are waiting for a climax, it finishes and we fast forward to a limp postscript. Generally, the second half of the film is a mess.

Okay, first, I'll make it clear that I am not a Mummy fan. This is not my monster of choice to begin with, but barring that fact I know a bad flick when I see one. I won't insult your intelligence by referring to this as a "film." This was a movie that had the audacity to tie Bram Stoker's name to it in hopes of saving it I assume. If you saw Bram Stoker's Dracula and liked it, don't let this one fool you, it doesn't compare.

Now, if you're that is not to say I hated this, but rather I expected lots more here. First of all, it seemed to remind me way too much of a very lame Sherlock Holmes or Agatha Christie meets the mummy sort of story and is written, directed and performed pretty much in that tone. If you're a Hammer film fan you may LIKE it, but you won't LOVE it.

The effects are just that, effects. Way too theatrical for this simplistically performed story. The characters are not only unbelievably portrayed and cast but not even exceptionally interesting. Louis Gossett Jr. is of course excellent as always, but even his excellent talents could not save this poor movie. Some of the other cast members were what actually saved this film for me at all.

The plot and story is so predictable. The ending is so over-used it shames the finer points of the whole movie -- What few there were. The seven fingered mummy bit is not only obviously awkward but pathetically prosthetized. The mummy herself is indeed disappointing enough without the bad hand effects. Some of the scenes seem to exist solely as fillers and I wonder if they were ever in Mr. Stoker's original story at all.

Over starved fans of horror, and Hammer films especially, will likely find this some what entertaining at least. Not much quality horror has been produced over the last 20 years or so therefore many will at the least find it watchable or of interest. Being a horror fan, that's pretty much how I found it to be though I would not actively seek out the video to add to my collection especially if paying money is involved. But if you can catch it on cable and have a spare VHS tape it might be fun to add to your collection in jest. Though if you're really looking for a good horror film, with a great story and excellent FX look for and buy The Mummy starring Brendan Frasier, you won't be disappointed.

The Legend of the Mummy is so bad, I would rather have my brain removed through my nose and my innards scooped out and placed in jars than watch it again. A turgid, muddled and totally inept movie, this lame horror stumbles awkwardly from one awful scene to another even slower than its titular creature.

Based on the Bram Stoker novel about the resurrection of a 7-fingered Egyptian queen (which was made into the almost as awful Blood from the Mummy's Tomb by Hammer in 1971), this film is poorly scripted, acted, directed and edited and the result is totally confusing and lacking in any suspense or shocks whatsoever.

Pretty Amy Locane (from John Water's Cry-Baby) plays Margaret Trelawny, the heroine of the tale whose father is attacked by a mysterious assailant whilst examining an old artifact from the cursed tomb of Queen Tera. Margaret's boyfriend Robert Wyatt (a totally bland Eric Lutes) tries to solve the mystery, along with dodgy treasure hunter Corbeck (Louis Gossett Jr., who still sounds and acts like the Drac he played in Enemy Mine) and ex-copper Daw (Mark Lindsay Chapman).

The film boasts bargain basement effects and features a barely seen (and probably for good reason) manky mummy. Enlivening proceedings (but only slightly) are some gratuitous sex scenes: sexy maid Lily (Laura Otis) imagines herself having sex in a bath, pudgy museum curator Brice Renard (Richard Karn) inexplicably beds a massive-jugged blonde hottie, and Margaret does a brief full-frontal flash towards the end (although this is more than likely a body double for Amy Locane).

When rating a horror film, I always take into consideration any inclusion of unnecessary scenes of quality female nudity (there's always room for some nekkid flesh); thus The Legend of the Mummy saves itself from the shame of receiving the lowest possible score by the (wrinkled) skin of its (decayed) teeth!

I had to struggle to get through this one. Louis Gossett Jr. (An Officer and a Gentleman) was the only reason I tuned in. he usually does a great job, and he really wasn't all that bad in a poor vehicle such as this.

This is one of those films that you need a bucket and a gun before you watch. That is to either throw up or shoot yourself if you can't escape.

The mummy was pathetic, there was little horror, and the ending was a mess.

Stay away - far away.