Hank Azaria: Man at Duff Beer Sign • Crazy Old Man • Chief Wiggum • ...

Treehouse of Horror VI

Man at Duff Beer Sign • Crazy Old Man • Chief Wiggum • Lou • Kirk Van Houten • TV Voice #1 • Professor Frink

[Principal Skinner is having a meeting with parents, but burning Willie rushes into the room]
Groundskeeper Willie: Help! Please, help me!
Principal Skinner: Willie, don't worry! Mr. Van Houten has the floor.
Mr. Van Houten: I, for one, would like to see the cafeteria menus in advance so parents can adjust their dinner menus accordingly. I don't like the idea of Milhouse having two spaghetti meals in one day.
[before anyone could answer, the entire class looks directly at Willie, who explodes into flame and screams]

[after Willie explodes into flame and screams, he becomes a skeleton]
Groundskeeper Willie: You'll pay for this! With your children's blood!
Chief Wiggum: Yeah, right. How ya gonna get 'em, skeleton power?
Groundskeeper Willie: I'll strike, where ya cannot protect them... In their dreams!

Dr. Hibbert: Homer, this is your physician, Dr. Julius Hibbert. Can you tell us what's it like in there?
Homer Simpson: Um, it's like, uh... did anyone see the movie Tron?
Dr. Hibbert: No.
Lisa Simpson: No.
Chief Wiggum: No.
Marge Simpson: No.
Bart Simpson: No.
Selma: No.
Chief Wiggum: No.
Ned Flanders: No.
Selma: No.
Prof. John Frink: No.
Reverend Lovejoy: No.
Chief Wiggum: Yes. I mean, I'm a-I mean, no. No.

Lisa Simpson: Well, where's my dad?
Prof. John Frink: Well, it should be clear to even the most dimwitted individual - who holds and advanced degree in hypothetical topology - that Homer Simpson has stumbled into...
[Dramating lighting]
Prof. John Frink: ... the Third Dimension!
Lisa Simpson: [Turns light back on] Sorry.
Prof. John Frink: Here is an ordinary square...
Chief Wiggum: Whoa, whoa, slow down, egghead.
Prof. John Frink: But suppose we extend the square beyond the two dimensions of our own universe along the hypothetical Z-axis there.
[All gasp in astonishment]
Prof. John Frink: This forms the three-dimensional object known as a cube, or a frinkahedron, in honor of its discoverer.
Homer Simpson: Help me! Are you helping me or are you going on and on?
Prof. John Frink: Oh, yeah. And of course within we find the doomed individual.
Chief Wiggum: Enough of your borax, Pointdexter! A man's life's at stake. We need action!
[Fires gun at portal]
Chief Wiggum: Take that, you lousy dimension!

[Homer's father, Abraham, arrives at his house wearing a diving suit]
Abraham Simpson: I'll save Homer! All I needs is four stout men to work the bellows.
Prof. John Frink: No, pops, it's too risky! For all we know, there could be cubes in there the size of gorillas and other large...
Homer Simpson: [disembodied] Help! I don't have much time.