William Fichtner credited as playing...
Phil Dearly
- Chief Wyatt Rash: My mother always used to say, "When life hands you potatoes, make potato salad!"
- Mona Dearly: Yeah? Well life handed me a whole pile-a shit! What am I supposed to make outta that?
- Phil Dearly: Shit salad?
- Deputy Tony Carlucci: (to Phil Dearly, after informing him of his wife's death) So, uh... you want to tell Jeff about his mom, or do you think we should do it, or...
- Phil Dearly: Yeah! Uh...
- Deputy Jimmy D: I mean, we'd be more than happy to do it, Phil, you know, it's just that, coming from you it may cushion the blow.
- Deputy Tony Carlucci: Being that, you know, he's your son and all.
- Phil Dearly: Well, in that case, it might be best if one of you did it.
- Rona: [begins to get fed up with Phil's sexual manners] Please, please, Phil, please, I beg you. Please tell me that I didn't spend all this time with you to end up like this.
- [Phil tries to answer]
- Rona: Don't do this! I'm a 33-year-old waitress at a frigging diner that doesn't encourage tipping!
- Phil Dearly: 33?
- [suddenly, without warning, Jeff bursts in scaring both of them]
- Jeff Dearly: [lividly] WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!
- Phil Dearly: [nervously] Well, that's uh... Well, me and Rona here are just...
- Rona: Phil, Jesus Christ, be a man!
- [Rona turns to Jeff very calmly]
- Rona: Jeff, whatever you think is happening in here is happening.
- Jeff Dearly: [glares at Phil] You're cheating on mom?
- Phil Dearly: Mom's dead, son?
- Jeff Dearly: [to Rona, seemingly hurt] Oh, but baby! How could you do this to me!
- Phil Dearly: Uh, excuse me, did you just say BABY?
- Cubby: [distantly] Keep it down over there! I'm paying by the hour!
- Jeff Dearly: HEY, YOU SHUT UP!
- Shirley: [seen with a whiplash next to Cubby in a robe exposing a harness on him] We're good people!
- Cubby: PLEASE! Have some respect!
- Shirley: What is the matter with you! You're going to get your whole...
- Jeff Dearly: [turns back to Phil] You're a dead man, Dearly!
- [Jeff storms off slamming the door]
- Phil Dearly: I better get the hell out of this joint.
- Phil Dearly: I would have told you before, but when family's involved, you know, things can get a little dicey.