Steve Buscemi: Randall

Monsters, Inc.

Randall

Randall: [pins Mike to the wall] Where's the kid?
Mike: Kid?
[chuckles nervously]
Mike: What kid?
Randall: It's here in the factory. Isn't it?
Mike: You're not pinning this on me! It never would've gotten out if *you* hadn't been cheating last night!
Randall: [outraged] Cheating? I...
[calms down]
Randall: Cheating. Right. Okay, I think I know how to make this all go away. What happens when the whistle blows in five minutes?
Mike: Uh, I get a time-out?
Randall: Everyone goes to lunch! Which means: the scare floor will be...?
Mike: ...Painted?
Randall: EMPTY! It'll be empty, you idiot! You see that clock? When the big hand is pointing up...
[forces Mike's left arm up]
Randall: and the little hand is pointing up...
[forces his right arm up]
Randall: the kid's door will be in my station. But when the big hand points down...
[bends the right arm over the left; Mike groans in pain]
Randall: the door will be gone. You have until then to put the kid back. Get the picture?
[Mike whimpers and nods]

Randall: [Finding out that he caught Mike instead of Boo] Wazowski! Where is it, you little one-eyed cretin?
Mike: Okay, first of all, it's "creetin". If you're gonna threaten me, do it properly. Second of all, you're nuts if you think kidnapping ME is gonna help YOU cheat your way to the top.
Randall: [chuckles evilly] You still think this is about that stupid scare record?
Mike: Well... I did. Right up until you... chuckled... like that... And now I'm thinking I should just get out of here.
[a Handle Bar is placed down preventing Mike from leaving, and his hands get cuffed on]
Randall: I am about to revolutionize the scaring industry, and when I do, even the great James P. Sullivan will be working of me. First I need to know where the kid is, and you're gonna tell me.

Mike: Psst, Fungus. Fungus, you like cars? Because I got a really nice car. You let me go, I'll give you... a ride... in the car. Please, Fungus?
Fungus: I'm sorry, Wazowski, but Randall said I'm not allowed to fraternize with victims of his evil plot.
[Sulley grabs Fungus from above, while Mike looks up overjoyed. In the next scene, Randall manages to plug the Scream Extractor back in, and then returns to the lab where he notices that Fungus is seated in where Mike was, with the Scream Extractor sucking him.]
Randall: [gasps] What happened? Where's Wazowski? Where is he?
[Randall turns off the machine as Fungus, now turned white and pale from the Scream Extractor, weakly points in a direction to his left]

Mike: [as the Scream Extractor approaches] What is that thing? What is that thing? Hey, hey, hey, that thing is moving. I don't like big, moving things that are moving towards me.
[the Scream Extractor comes to a stop, pointing itself directly at Mike]
Randall: Say hello to the Scream Extractor.
Mike: Hello. Hey, where are you going? C'mon, we'll talk! We'll have a latte!

[Randall cuffs Boo onto the chair at the Scream Extractor, preparing to extract her screams to impress Waternoose]
Henry J. Waternoose: Finally. I shouldn't have trusted you. Because of you, I had to banish my top scarer.
Randall: Ah, with this machine, we won't need scarers. Besides, Sullivan got what he deserved.
Henry J. Waternoose: Sullivan was twice the scarer you'll ever be!

[Sully goes looking for Boo; Mike tries to talk him out of it]
Mike: Someone else will find the kid. I'll be their problem, not ours. She's out of our hair!
[they bump into an Invisible Randall]
Randall: [Turning Visible again] What are you two doing?
Monster: They're rehearsing a play.
Mike: [singing] She's out of our hair...!

Randall: So, how about this kid getting loose? Crazy, huh?
Sulley: Uh, yeah, crazy.
Randall: Word on the street is the kid has been traced to the factory. Know anything about that?
Sulley: Uh, no, uh...
Mike: No, no way. But if it was an inside job, I'd put my money on Waxford.
Randall: Waxford?
Mike: Yeah, works over in sector 6, he's got those shifty eyes.
Randall: Hey, Waxford!

[after Randall makes one of his Scares while trying to take the lead past Sulley]
Fungus: Randall?
Randall: What?
Fungus: [Points at the Leaderboard] Look!
[Randall has scored enough points to overtake Sulley and take the lead on the Leaderboard]
Celia: [Over PA] Attention everyone! We have a New Scare Leader. Randall Boggs.
[a huge crowd forms around an overjoyed Randall to congratulate him, only for Sulley to overtake him and once again be at the top not long later]
Celia: [Over PA] Nevermind.
[the crowd leaves, leaving Randall to continue being frustrated]
Sulley: [chuckles after having filled multiple scream canisters at once] Slumber Party.

Henry J. Waternoose: [In the Distance] Finish him off!
[Randall whilst invisible hits Sulley with a Scream Canister, knocking him down, which terrifies Boo who hides out of the way in the corner]
Randall: You don't know how long I've waited to do that Sullivan!

Randall: I'm in the zone today, Sullivan. I'm gonna do some serious scaring, putting up some big numbers.

Randall: [to Sulley, hanging on from a door] Look at everybody's favorite scarer now, you stupid, pathetic waste!
[starts stomping on Sulley's fingers]
Randall: You've been number one for too long, Sullivan. Now your time is up. And don't worry, I'll take good care of the kid.
[Just then Boo jumps on Randall and attacks him with a baseball bat; Sulley climbs back on and restrains Randall]
Boo: Roar! Roar!
Sulley: She's not scared of you any more.
Boo: Roar!
Sulley: Looks like you're out of a job.

Randall: [to Fungus, as he's still not at the top on the Leader board] If I don't see a door in my station in 5 seconds, I will personally put you through the shredder.