Tim Robbins credited as playing...
Norville Barnes
- [Norville is putting mail into boxes]
- Norville: What do you do if the envelope is too big for the slot?
- Ancient Sorter: Well, if you fold 'em, they fire you. I usually throw 'em out.
- Norville: [to Amy] Now let me ask you a question: Would an imbecile come up with this?
- [shows Amy a picture of a circle]
- Reporter: Did you have any idea it would be such a huge response?
- Norville: Well frankly, I don't think anybody expected this much hoopla.
- [singing the Muncie school fight song]
- Norville, Amy Archer: Fight on, fight on, dear old Muncie/Fight on, hoist the gold and blue/You'll be tattered, torn, and hurtin'/Once the Munce is done with you/Go... Eagles!
- Norville: It's fun, it's healthy, it's good exercise. The kids will just love it. and we put a little sand inside to make the experience more pleasant.
- Buzz: What's your pleasure, buddy?
- Norville: Forty-four.
- Buzz: Forty-four! Top brass floor... Say, buddy, what takes fifty years to get up to the top floor, and thirty seconds to get down? Waring Hudsucker! Ya get it, buddy? Say, buddy...
- [elevator doors open, people enter]
- Buzz: Mr. Klein up to nine, Mrs. Dell, Personnel, Mr. Levin, thirty-seven.
- Mr. Levin: [correcting him] Thirty-six.
- Buzz: WALK DOWN!
- Buzz: [a heavyset man approaches the elevator] Ladies and gentlemen, please step to the rear. Here comes the gargantuan Mr. Grier.
- Mr. Grier: Buzz.
- Buzz: Say, buddy! Who is the most liquid businessman on the street? Waring Hudsucker! Say, buddy, when is the sidewalk fully dressed? When it's Waring Hudsucker!
- [laughs, but no one else does]
- Buzz: Ya get it, buddy? It's a pun, it's knee slapper, it's a play on Jesus, Joseph and Mary... is that a blue letter? Cripes-amighty, why didn't ya tell a guy? Hold on, folks, we're express to the top floor!
- Reporter: Did they consider you an idea man when they promoted you from the mailroom?
- Norville: Well I guess so. I don't think they promoted me because i'm a shmo.
- Norville: I just got hired today.
- Ancient Sorter: Hmm-mmm.
- Norville: You know, entry level.
- Ancient Sorter: Tell me about it.
- Norville: But I got big ideas.
- Amy Archer: I've been watching you Norville Barnes, even though you're trying to avoid me.
- Norville: Amy, you don't...
- Amy Archer: Shut up! And don't think I hadn't noticed how you'd changed.