It's Pat: The Movie

I WANTED to like this movie, REALLY I did. Dave Foley, Ween, Julia Sweeney......but I have to say it is BAD. A lesson should've been learned long ago that SNL skits are 5 minutes for a reason. There is really no way to pad em out to feature films: except for Waynes World,which I liked. I dont know whose dumber: the people who keep makin these movies or us dumbies who keep renting em.

I actually liked the sketch "Pat" on SNL. It was a fresh idea - honestly, how many other "andrognenous character-sketch" routines can you name? It had its limitations, and it sure as hell could have been pushed past the "Pat almost reveals his/her gender but then doesn't" joke that seems to have been the limit of its humor.

So when there was a movie, I thought, "Hey, they're finally going to push the character beyond the one-joke limit. I like Pat, sure, I'll like the movie!" Well, I was stunned at how ineptly and poorly executed the whole thing was. The Pat character is immediately portrayed as boorish, intrusive, insensitive, and a host of other undesirable characteristics. Who decided this is what Pat was about? Who thought this would be funny? And how does this relate to the SNL character, anyway? I see no resemblance at all.

Even Dave Foley, whom I love and who is well-known for his excellence at portraying long-suffering comic characters, cannot soften the unrelenting ugliness that Pat exudes. In addition, I really think they took the low road with the "Chris" character. Of all the androgynous names they could have chosen (Terry, Bobby, Sam, the list is long), "Chris" is so boring! And the style of androgyny that was chosen, "70's-esque flower child", complete with page-boy haircut, while certainly complimenting Pat's dowdiness, was just one more joke with a very short lifespan.

By the time you finally realize the ugly boorishness that Pat is all about is not going to be a short-lived bit, but is instead the main (and only) joke, and that you will get no reprieve at all, ever, through the entire film, it will be too late. You will have suffered through the whole film, with very few laughs, and entirely missed out on a "naive-but-loveable-doofus" version of Pat, that you might have expected to get.

Alright, crappy movie, but Dave Foley's in it! Which automatically makes it at least MARGINALLY amusing. The only reason I rented this movie (and with a very red face as I went up to pay for it) was because Dave Foley (who plays Chris, Pat's equally androgynous lover in the movie) is a comic genius and my favorite actor in the world. Now if Dave HADN'T been in it would I have enjoyed it at all? Hmm, there's a question, I may have enjoyed the singing of "La Freak" but that's just because I'm a sucker for disco music too! But anyway, Dave Foley is great (not like this movie encourages greatness on ANY possible level, but anyway) and he is strangely attractive as a woman (as observed MORE than enough in his Kids in the Hall days). If you want a funnier (albiet, still a bit silly) movie with Dave Foley in it, opt for "The Wrong Guy", Dave co-wrote and stars in it, and the band Barenaked Ladies is in it as an added bonus. Dave Foley rocks!

What starts off as a promising comedy quickly turns into mindless dribble quicker than you can say "Chalupa". The problem is that Pat can't carry a movie. If Pat had been in a very small supporting role in a movie, that would be barable, but this is just one of the most agonizing films ever. Even though there are many scenes that let Dave Foley bring out his cross-dressing best, they don't really point into any direction. The plot? Well, it's just a 5 minute Pat sketch stretched out to be 77 agonizing minutes. The movie relies on spit jokes and gender benders to carry the film. Not good. Luckily, SNL (The best show on TV) rebounded with the classics Stuart Saves His Family and Night at the Roxbury.

Mercy what an awful excuse for a film. Sexless (meaning impossible to tell whether male or female) Pat (Julia Sweeney) wants to get married to another equally sexless person in this amazingly poor motion picture that was just a ploy by those morons at Saturday Night Live to make a few quick bucks. They made very few bucks as the movie-going public saw through this mess before they ever set foot into a theater. Tasteless and worthless. Turkey (0 stars out of 5).