John Travolta: Chili Palmer

Get Shorty

Chili Palmer

Chili Palmer: Rough business, this movie business. I'm gonna have to go back to loan-sharking just to take a rest.

Ray "Bones" Barboni: Let me explain something to you. Momo is dead. Which means that everything he had now belongs to Jimmy Cap, including you. Which also means, that when I speak, I speak for Jimmy. E.g., from now on, you start showing me the proper fucking respect.
Chili Palmer: "E.g." means "for example". What I think you want to say is "I.e.".
Ray "Bones" Barboni: Bullshit! That's short for "ergo".
Chili Palmer: Ask your man.
Bodyguard: To the best of my knowledge, "e.g." means "for example".
Ray "Bones" Barboni: E.g., i.e., fuck you! The point is this: is that, When I say "jump", you say "OK", okay?

Bo Catlett: I'd like to introduce my associate, The Bear. Movie stuntman, champion bodybuilder. Throws out things I don't want.
Bear: I think you ought to turn around and head back to Miami.
Chili Palmer: So you're a stuntman, huh?
Bear: Yeah.
Chili Palmer: You any good?
Bear: Am I any good?
[He turns to Bo, laughing. Chili grabs him by the balls, then throws him down the stairs]
Chili Palmer: That's not bad for a guy his size.

Chili Palmer: Martin, look at me.
Martin: I'm looking at you.
Chili Palmer: No, I want you to look at me the way I'm looking at you. Put it in your eyes, 'You're mine, asshole,' without saying it.
Martin: Like this?
[heavy lidded eyes]
Chili Palmer: What you're telling me, you're tired? You wanna go to bed?
Martin: Wait. How about this?
[squints]
Chili Palmer: Now you're squinting like you need glasses.
Martin: Well, what are you getting...
Chili Palmer: Look at me. What I'm thinking is, 'You're mine. I fuckin' own you.' But what I'm not doing is feeling anything about it one way or the other. You understand? You're not a person to me, you're a name in my collection book, a guy owes me money, that's all.
[Martin does the look once again]
Chili Palmer: Whoah.
Karen Flores: He's... he's good.
Chili Palmer: You nailed it.
Martin: [guttural] That's what I think of you, asshole. Nothing.
Chili Palmer: That's why you're Martin Weir.

[after Bo's balcony rail gives way, pitching Bo over the side to the bottom of the canyon]
Chili Palmer: How do you think that happened?
[Bear holds up a handful of screws and nuts]
Bear: Beats the shit out of me.

Chili Palmer: How did you get in here?
Ray Bones: It was easy. I told 'em I was you, I acted real stupid and they believed me.

Chili Palmer: Now I've been shot at three times before. Twice on purpose and once by accident. And I'm still here. And I'm gonna be here for as long as I want to be.

Leo: But how will you find me? You don't know where I'll be... I don't know where I'll be.
Chili Palmer: I'll find you, Leo, you leave a trail like a fuckin' caterpillar.

Bo Catlett: You broke into my house, and I have a witness to it.
Chili Palmer: What?
Bo Catlett: Only this time it ain't no John Wayne and Dean Martin shooting bad guys in "El Dorado."
Chili Palmer: That was "Rio Bravo." Robert Mitchum played the drunk in "El Dorado." Dean Martin played the drunk in "Rio Bravo." Basically, it was the same part. Now John Wayne, he did the same in both. He played John Wayne.
Bo Catlett: Man, I can't wait for you to be dead.

Karen Flores: I know I'm better than what I've been doing all these years, walking around in fuck-me pumps and a tank-top, waiting until it was time to scream.
Chili Palmer: Yeah, but what a scream.
Karen Flores: Oh yeah, it's a real talent. Look, all I'm saying is, what I wouldn't give for the chance to say one really great line. You know, like in that great Bette Davis movie where she says, "I'd kiss you... "
Chili Palmer: "But I just washed my hair."

Chili Palmer: If you're gonna set somebody up, it's gotta be a surprise, you got that?
Bear: You spotted them, huh?
Chili Palmer: What, did you see that work in some movie you got beat up in?

Chili Palmer: Harry, look at me. You're trying to tell me you fucked up without sounding stupid, and that's hard to do.

Chili Palmer: Hey, Karen, how you doing?
Karen Flores: What are you doing here?
Chili Palmer: Listen, I wanted to come by and apologize for breaking in the way I did last night.
Karen Flores: So, let me get this straight. You broke in again to apologize for breaking in before?
Chili Palmer: No, no. Your patio door was open. And you shouldn't do that because you got a lot of nice things in this house.
Karen Flores: Well, make sure you lock it on your way out.

Chili Palmer: Hey, Bones, that's quite a scar you got on your head. Why don't you have these guys fit you for a rug, cover it up for you?
Ray "Bones" Barboni: [to the barbers] You two geezers take your game to the park.
[He goes into the back room]
Bodyguard: [menacing] This man is the man, you understand what I'm saying, motherfucker? He's *Mister* Bones. And you speak to Mister Bones from now on.
Chili Palmer: [quietly] Come on, you can do better than him, can't you?
Bodyguard: [lowers voice] Not these days. Not unless you speak Spanish.