Dick Miller credited as playing...
Uncle Willy
- Cordelia: [to Brayker] You hurry up and finish dinner,
- [she climbs onto table in a seductive manner]
- Cordelia: I'll take care of "dessert".
- [a black cat also climb onto the table and meows]
- Uncle Willy: Ah, don't worry. Good Cleo knows better than to eat that slop.
- Irene: Goddammit! Get that pussy off the table!
- [Cordelia quickly gets off the table]
- Irene: I meant the cat.
- Uncle Willy: [drunk] Boy, listen to that thunder! God's doing some serious thinkin' tonight. I bet he's saying, "On second thought, maybe I shoulda given it all to the monkeys."
- Brayker: Maybe it's not too late.
- Brayker: God DAMNIT I'M *NOT* Making this stuff up
- [removes his glove to reveal his symbols]
- Brayker: And I didn't... I didn't Ask For *This*! You wanna know what's going on? Shall I tell you? In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth...
- Irene: You're talking Genesis? That beginning?
- Brayker: And the Earth was a formless void, and darkness covered the face of the deep. But the darkness wasn't empty. It was full of creatures, full of demons. And they had seven keys, formed into a circle that focused the power of the cosmos into their hands, until God stepped forth and said, "let there be light." And there was light. He scattered the demons, and he scattered the keys all across the universe. Then we fast-forward about two or three million millenia. Now the demons are back. They got six of the keys. And one day they find the seventh key here on earth. And to save it, God filled it with the blood of a carpenter who had been crucified by the Romans, and gave it to a thief named Sirach.
- Jeryline: The blood ins... inside? Is that...?
- Brayker: Some of it, yeah. It gets used, you see. Sirach had to refill it.
- [points to his throat]
- Brayker: Bad neck wound, talon caught the eye right here. Most of what's in here now belonged to a soldier named Dickerson, who gave it to me in France, August 23, 1917. Funny how you remember the big dates, isn't it?
- Deputy Bob Martel: Jeez. That, uh, that would make you...
- Uncle Willie: What happens when you run out of blood?
- Brayker: They bring back the darkness.
- Uncle Willie: Just like that?
- Brayker: Just like that. So... now you know. You feel better?
- Brayker: [eating slop] You want some?
- Uncle Willy: Hell, no! I'm just thinking about how much better that stuff looked when it was roadkill.
- [after a demon trys to break through the barrier and is melted]
- Uncle Willy: OH that is disgusting
- Jeryline: WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SHIT?