Fred Ward credited as playing...
Earl Bassett
- Kate (White) Reilly: Who named them graboids anyway?
- Earl Bassett: [chuckles] A friend of ours, Walter Chang, he named them, then they ate him.
- [about a groaning Graboid]
- Earl Bassett: Must be sick.
- Grady: Probably ate someone that didn't agree with it.
- [Upon being introduced to Burt's anti-tank rifle]
- Earl Bassett: Man Burt, you put a whole new shine on the word 'overkill'.
- Burt Gummer: When you need it, and don't have it... you sing a different tune.
- Kate (White) Reilly: Believe it or not I was actually a Playmate once. Almost gave my dad a heart attack.
- Earl Bassett: Miss October 1974?
- Kate (White) Reilly: Shit!
- [hiding from the Shriekers, Earl, Grady, and Kate are on top of some containers, Burt is inside the scoop of a bulldozer]
- Grady: Hey, Burt! Are you SURE you don't have any more bullets? Did you check ALL your pockets?
- Burt Gummer: [looking angry] You know, as I lie here, I can't help but comment: the reason I am out of nine-millimeter rounds is I was NOT... properly briefed, and the reason for that is this mission was NOT properly researched. If certain people had bothered to gather intelligence on the creatures before BUMBLING into the situation...
- Earl Bassett: Knock it off, Burt! Nobody made you come!
- Burt Gummer: We wouldn't be down here with single-shot big bores when we should be packing full auto, preferably belt-fed!
- [a Shrieker near Burt grunts loudly]
- Burt Gummer: SHUT UP!
- Grady: They're Precambrian lifeforms, Burt! How's anybody supposed to research Precambrian lifeforms...
- Earl Bassett: [cuts him, bellows] WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE NOW! We're stuck on a goddamn roof with a bunch of--a bunch of what's-it's trying to eat us! I mean, I've done this before, and I did not like it!
- Grady: [furiously offended] Oh, okay! Now it's all my fault! So, things didn't work out exactly the way we planned! Oh, I'm SO sorry!
- Earl Bassett: Well, you should be!
- Burt Gummer: [yells over them] If I had the right tools, I'd finish the job!
- Kate (White) Reilly: JEEZ! Would you just all relax! Now look... Nobody's heard from us since last night. Which means that pretty soon they're going to be up here looking for us, right? So, all we have to do is sit... and wait. Okay?
- [Grady and Earl go silent]
- Kate (White) Reilly: Burt?
- [Burt crosses his arms reluctantly agreeing with her]
- Burt Gummer: [solemnly] Heather's not coming back.
- Earl Bassett: No?
- Burt Gummer: She called and told me to send her the HK91.
- Earl Bassett: Ouch!
- Earl Bassett: [to Grady] You know, you might come in useful. While they are eating you it will give me a chance to get away.
- [Coyote howls]
- Grady: Is that a Coyote?
- Earl Bassett: Yup.
- [it howls again]
- Grady: Man he better keep quiet.
- [another howl cut short by the sound of the coyote being eaten]
- Earl Bassett: Yup.
- Earl Bassett: [loses at rock-paper-scissors] No!
- [pauses]
- Earl Bassett: Rock rips through paper!
- Grady: Huh?
- Grady: No offense Earl but you're nervous as a Chihuahua.
- Earl Bassett: I'm not nervous, I'm alert.
- Grady: Whatever.
- Burt Gummer: I knew it. Infrared. It doesn't hear us; it doesn't actually see us; it senses the heat of our bodies. See that? The thing that rises up must be the heat sensor. You feel that? Gives off a lot of heat when it screams.
- Kate (White) Reilly: That's it. I bet that's the way they communicate. The sound doesn't matter. I mean they make noise, but they signal each other with their body heat.
- Earl Bassett: It only sees heat?
- Kate (White) Reilly: Yes, that's not so weird. A rattlesnake strikes at body heat.
- Earl Bassett: Well that's why they tore up the cars-- because the engines were hot. They thought it was food.
- Kate (White) Reilly: And the same thing with the radio tower. That electronic gear puts off all kinds of heat.
- Burt Gummer: So basically, they bite anything that's warm.
- Grady: You mean they been actin' so smart 'cause they're so stupid?
- Kate (White) Reilly: Anyway, we've been pretty nervous down here. Glad you guys were willin' to come all this way.
- Earl Bassett: Yeah, it sure is in the middle of nowhere.
- Grady: Well, of course. Stuff like this only happens in the middle of nowhere.
- Earl Bassett: You're not scared?
- Kate (White) Reilly: Shit, yeah, I'm scared! But... I'm also fascinated. It's, uh, with me, fascinated usually wins.
- Burt Gummer: I didn't know... how could I have known? I wanted maximum penetration!
- Earl Bassett: [Looks at destroyed engine] Well, you got it.
- Earl Bassett: [faced with a huge number of Graboids] We're gonna need some help!
- Grady: Help? Who'd be crazy enough to wanna help us in this mess?
- [scene cuts to Burt Gummer]
- Earl Bassett: Who are you? And why are you so dumb?
- Grady: Oh, Grady. Grady. Grady Hoover. It's an honour to meet you, Mr. Basset, sir. I'm probably your biggest fan.
- Grady: Something ate it!
- Earl Bassett: In two minutes?
- Grady: Well, somethin' happened to it, 'cause there is nothin' left inside.
- Earl Bassett: Something came out of it.
- Grady: What do you mean, "something came out of it"?
- Earl Bassett: Yeah, It did that thing that things do when they change, you know-- there's a word for it, uh-- It turned into something else like a caterpillar does. Only I bet that whatever came out wasn't no sweet little butterfly.