The Bruce

The English are a little too evil, the Scots are a bit too

heroic. The dialogue is overly dramatic at times, and the

transitions between scenes could be smoother.

Still, "The Bruce" has the feel of authentic, if unpolished,

history ... even if it does play loosely with some important

facts.

Sandy Welch is no Gibson or Branagh, but he makes a stalwart

Bruce. And Brian Blessed chews the scenery in delightful

villainy as Edward I.

While lacking the budget needed to make the final battle truly

impressive, they still marshalled an impressive crowd for the

English and Scottish armies. It is, according to filmmakers, the

"largest filmed reconstruction of medieval battle ever staged in

the British Isles."

Allowing for a few failings and shortcomings, the film still

does a convincing portrayal.

I got this film (and an exclusive baseball cap - hence the snazzy tagline above) back in 1996 when I turned 20. Given that Braveheart dominated Scottish cinema - even overshadowing the superior Rob Roy with Liam Neeson and Jessica Lang - a crowd funded production with distinct my mixed values was always going to struggle, no matter how well intentioned.

So I have a little soft spot for an amatuerish, threadbare movie that made a deeply flawed, if honest, attempt to accurately address the historical record during a crucial period of Scotland's history - no easy feat given the fragmented, contradictory, mythical or non - existent accounts of these times. A straightforward telling was never going to be possible.

Although it was a bit of fun watching 1990s pop culture icon Michael Van Wijk aka the villianeous Wolf from ITV's Gladiators, and Scottish folk singer Ronnie Brown (the surviving Corrie), a special nod must be given to Oliver Reed - head and shoulders the best thing about The Bruce. With his quiet, dignified and restrained performance was Reed showing us what he was capable of as an actor - preparation for an first class swansong with a Gladiator of a different kind?

What was the most irritating thing about this film?

The appalling acting? The revelation that medieval knights apparently fought with an assortment of *very* wobbly rubber axes and other assorted joke shop armaments (honestly, a Pythonesque cow flip would not have been misplaced). The fact that one of the most important battles in 14th century Europe looked more like a disorganised pub fight, with no discernible cues to the viewer as to who was English or Scottish? The incomprehensibly boring narrative? The most ham-fisted, cheesiest, cliché ridden 'tottie-scone' dialogue, ever?

Perhaps all of the above.

To me, however, there was a general eclipse of all that. It was the following.

The quest for Scottish Independence was decades in the making. It saw some of the most deftifying, heroic, savage, heartbreaking and bloodthirsty history that's ever been. We're talking about a time that, when the Scottish defensive wall at Berwick developed a weak spot, children and woman were sent to fill the place to keep the invader out. Every man, woman and child was at war.

In 1996 Scotland deserved a 'proper' movie. Yes, Braveheart was a movie that *deserved* to be made, in it's identification and selling of Scottish history - I applauded it's success - but in doing so I also openly acknowledged the fact that it was a bad film. A very bad film.

Consequently, 'The Bruce' served only to mutilate and befoul not only history itself, but the chance of one day exploring that history in a better capacity than Braveheart ever did - through film - by simply telling the story (trust me, a Screenwriter's dream - as it is, left well alone) on the back of a good budget and high-profile pitch.

The Director of the Bruce should be trialled for Cultural crimes and then, publicly, carted naked through the old streets of Edinburgh, before slowly being drawn against 'The Maiden'.

Shooting adverts for spam products might have been a challenge for him. Instead, he created the single worst movie on the planet (in every conceivable sense) with material that would have gifted a talented directorial new-start with a plethora of creative devices and opportunity.

In short, I wanted to scoop my own eyes out and replace them with cartoon bomb-jacks. And, in short, he ruined it for real directors of the future.

I invested hard cash in this production and may therefore seem biased in my opinion; so if I say this is the worst film you'll ever see, the worst scripted, cast (except for Oliver Reed), edited and most of all DIRECTED, you'll probably get my message! I am a Scot as well as a first class honours graduate in Film Production and a History teacher, so maybe I know what I'm talking about. How I would love to meet the Producer/Director Bob Carruthers, of this appalling rubbish, the man who took my thousands of pounds, and managed to turn the greatest story in Scottish History into the most embarrassing production you could ever imagine, so that I could tell him to move over and let someone who knows how to make a real film take over - and even give me my money back!

Reed, Blessed, Welch and van Wijk all turn in quality performances in this under-rated account of Scotland's greatest warrior (are you watching William Wallace?) but one cast member stands head and shoulders above his colleagues. In the final set, Stuart Poole, clad in garb to make Robin Hood jealous, congratulates the Bruce on his vanquishing of the foe. The dignity, grace and emotion evident in Poole's performance is a joy to behold. It's a shame he isn't credited on imdb...