Dennis Farina credited as playing...
Coach Bailey
- Coach John Bailey: (now as coach of the Charlotte Hornets) Hey, Zimmer, where's your coach - still in the ladies' room?
- Carl Zimmer: I don't know where she is.
- Coach John Bailey: Well, if she doesn't show up here pretty quick, you're going to have awfully big shoes to fill, even if they are high heels.
- Carl Zimmer: Uh, John, I've been around for a lot of years. I learned from the best.
- Coach John Bailey: Well, thanks, Carl. I appreciate that, really. Thank you.
- Carl Zimmer: I wasn't talking about you.
- Coach John Bailey: Chump.
- [after live fireworks set fire to Walt Frazier's retired jersey in the rafters of Madison Square Gardens]
- Edwina "Eddie" Franklin: That was Walt Frazier's jersey!
- Fair Weather Fan: That's Walt Frazier's jersey!
- Walt Frazier: Hey, yo, that's my jersey!
- "Wild Bill" Burgess: And that's just the beginning, folks. We got more surprises for you. And don't forget the honorary coach contest at halftime. Let's play some basketball.
- Marv Albert: Say goodbye to tradition. "Wild Bill" Burgess has just torched Walt Frazier's jersey.
- Coach John Bailey: A freak show. He's going to turn it into a freak show.
- Referee: That's no basket! Charge! Knicks win!
- Ivan Radovadovitch: Ivan take charge!
- Coach John Bailey: (to referee) You cost us the game. You stink.
- Coach John Bailey: [during the pre-game pep talk] Let's remember we got a game to win! Where's Taylor?
- Carl Zimmer: He's praying.
- Coach John Bailey: Well, tell him to pray over here!
- Carl Zimmer: Darren!
- [Taylor joins the huddle]
- Coach John Bailey: Come on, guys, let's go! Hastings! Hastings! Wake up! If you're open, take the jumper, if not, look down low for Ivan!
- Ivan Radovadovitch: I-van.
- Coach John Bailey: Whatever.
- Ivan Radovadovitch: Ivan make basket.
- Stacy Patton: Whoa, whoa, whoa, if Stacey Patton don't shoot, Stacey Patton don't play.
- Nate Wilson: Man, quit referring to yourself in the third person and pay attention, asshole.
- Darren Taylor: Hey, man, watch the language!
- Stacy Patton: Back off, pal!
- Coach John Bailey: Hey, hey, hey, Patton, I'm not warning you again, okay?
- Ivan Radovadovitch: Ivan make basket!
- Carl Zimmer: Excusee me, Coach, I'd look for Jamal.
- Coach John Bailey: Right, right. Hey, Logo-head, what are you looking at?
- Terry Hastings: Nate, she used my tickets on her divorce lawyer.
- Coach John Bailey: Excuse me, would you mind getting in the game here?
- Referee: Hey, let's play ball.
- Edwina "Eddie" Franklin: Do you have 666 on your head?
- Coach John Bailey: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bye-bye! Bye-bye! Say, Eddie, come back again when you can afford the seats back here.
- Edwina "Eddie" Franklin: Soon as you start winning, I'll be back.
- Coach John Bailey: So long!
- Edwina "Eddie" Franklin: Hey, Zimmer, get a life, get a face, get a new coat, buddy!