Charles Durning credited as playing...
Santa Claus
- Elmo: Christmas every day makes everyone happy!
- Santa Claus: Not *quite* everyone.
- Elmo: Oh! It's Santa Claus!
- Santa Claus: Shh!
- [looks left and right; glares down at Elmo]
- Santa Claus: Elmo, what have you done?
- Elmo: Elmo wished to have Christmas every day! Yay!
- Santa Claus: You *can't* have Christmas every day!
- Elmo: Yes, you *can*!
- Santa Claus: No!
- Elmo: Yes! It's easy! You have Christmas today, then you have Christmas tomorrow, and then the day after that...
- Santa Claus: Elmo.
- Elmo: ...and then the day after that.
- Santa Claus: Elmo.
- Elmo: Christmas, Christmas, Christmas every day! And nobody has to work or go to school...
- Santa Claus: *Elmo*!
- Elmo: *What, Santa*?
- Santa Claus: If people don't work, who makes things we need? And if kids don't go to school, how do they learn the alphabet? Christmas every day is a bad idea, Elmo. Forget about it.
- Elmo: But why?
- Santa Claus: Because it's better to wait for Christmas and have it once a year, and live a life in between. Christmas is fun, but Christmas every day is too much.
- [Santa plays mini golf; two elfs burst into his office]
- Elf: Santa!
- Elf: Hey, Santa!
- Elf: Yo, Santa!
- Santa Claus: What's going on?
- Elf: Oh, Santa! Santa, it's Christmas *again*!
- Santa Claus: It *can't* be!
- Elf: It *is*! Did you give someone three wishes *again*?
- Santa Claus: A little red monster on Sesame Street, Elmo. I gotta go talk to him.