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Steven Seagal and Keenen Ivory Wayans in The Glimmer Man (1996)

Robert Mailhouse: Smith's Bodyguard

The Glimmer Man

Robert Mailhouse credited as playing...

Smith's Bodyguard

Quotes2

  • [Smith's bodyguard has been mocking Cole's Zen ideals]
  • Jack Cole: You really shouldn't knock Chinese potions. In fact, I've got something in my pocket that'll *completely* clear up that bruise on your forehead.
  • Smith's Bodyguard: What bruise?
  • Jack Cole: [knock the bodyguard to the ground] *THAT* bruise!
  • Lento's Maitre'D: [Cole drops by Lento's Steakhouse to have a chat with Smith. As Cole goes in, the Maitre'D is on the phone] ... Hello, Lento's... No, we're closed for a private lunch...
  • [He notices Cole but blows him off]
  • Lento's Maitre'D: There's nothing I can do about it... That's what I'm telling you. We're closed today. Tomorrow we'll be open...
  • [Cole rings the service bell insistently]
  • Lento's Maitre'D: Excuse me.
  • [to Cole]
  • Lento's Maitre'D: Hey, asshole; what are you, blind? We're closed, okay?
  • Jack Cole: You talk too much.
  • [He drops the Maitre'D with a punch and picks up the phone]
  • Jack Cole: Yeah, come on in. We'll get you a table.
  • [He hangs up and strolls through the restaurant towards the VIP area, but is intercepted by Lento's bouncer]
  • Smith's Bodyguard: ...You're unbelievable. What are you doing here, huh? You need to turn around and leave; that's what you need to do.
  • [Cole wrenches the bouncer's wrist and shoves him to the floor. Then he approaches Smith's table, where Smith is chatting with a senator]
  • Jack Cole: You don't call, you don't write; and, what's worse, you don't take *my* calls.
  • [the bouncer reappears]
  • Smith's Bodyguard: Excuse me, Mr. Senator; I'm sorry...
  • [to Cole]
  • Smith's Bodyguard: Why don't you take your little sensitive ponytail, and your little sissy beads, and get out of here. Okay?
  • [Cole knocks him through a glass-and-wood partition, and then proceeds to question Smith about the "Family Man's" identity. After doing this, Cole is showing himself out when more of Lento's bouncers intercept him]
  • Smith's Bodyguard: If you ever pull that with me again, I'll kill you. And all the Chinese potions in the world will not save you next time.
  • Jack Cole: You really shouldn't knock Chinese potions. I have something in my pocket right now which will completely clear up that bruise on your forehead.
  • Smith's Bodyguard: What bruise?
  • [Cole flattens him]
  • Jack Cole: That bruise.
  • [He knocks out the other bouncers, demolishing most of Lento's in the process]
  • Jack Cole: Do you guys validate parking?
  • [Passing by the reception desk, he answers the ringing phone]
  • Jack Cole: Hello, Lento's... No, that won't work; we're closed for renovation. I'd say two months... Yeah, thanks.
  • [He departs]

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