Michael J. Nelson credited as playing...
Mike Nelson
- Cal Meecham: [after German scientist comments on Mozart at dinner] What do you think of Mr. Mozart, Exeter?
- Exeter: I'm afraid I don't know the chap.
- Tom Servo: "I'm not an alien!"
- Exeter: My mind must have been wandering. Your composer, of course.
- Cal Meecham: *Our* composer - he belongs to the world!
- Exeter: Yes, indeed.
- Mike: "I'm not an alien."
- Cal Meecham: That dinner, Exeter, was even more perfect than you promised. Now if you'll excuse me, I could do with some fresh air myself.
- Crow T. Robot: He's gonna get high!
- Cal Meecham: Would you care to join me, Dr. Adams?
- Tom Servo: "Uh, no!"
- Cal Meecham: You, Dr. Carlson?
- Mike: "Your turn to walk the Cal."
- Exeter: Why don't you? Show him the grounds.
- Crow T. Robot: "I dare ya!"
- Exeter: We won't start cracking the whip on Meecham until tomorrow.
- Tom Servo: "Then I ram my ovipositor down your throat, and lay my eggs in your chest! But I'm *not* an alien!"
- Exeter: Now place your hands above the rail
- [hands suddenly attach to the rail]
- Exeter: ... they're magnetized.
- Mike: And if your hands were metal, that would mean something.
- [upon seeing that there is no one flying the plane]
- Mike: I'm your pilot, Claude Rains. Your co-pilot, Harvey the Rabbit.
- [as Cal and Joe assemble the Interositor]
- Crow T. Robot: Science and Industry!
- Tom Servo: See big men sticking screw drivers into things - turning them - AND ADJUSTING THEM!
- Crow T. Robot: Build your very own Atom Storage Box!
- Mike: Bringing you state-of-the-art in soft-serve technology!
- Crow T. Robot: Removes lids off bottles and jars of all sizes - and it really, really works.
- Benkitnorf: [the crew catches Benkitnorf in the shower on Tom Servo's interositer] Man, you guys scared the living daylights out of me!
- Mike: It's working! Hey! Hi, is Exeter there?
- Benkitnorf: Nah, him and Brack went down to Headbutt Days for Shelly. I gotta meet 'em in the beer tent in about fifteen minutes, so I gotta get going, 'kay?
- Tom Servo: No, wait! We're trapped in space! Can we use this thing to get back to Earth?
- Benkitnorf: I don't know. Geez... let's see, maybe this does something...
- [pushes button, zapping Servo]
- Benkitnorf: Crap. That's not it. Hang on...
- [gets manual]
- Benkitnorf: Okay. Did you use the Intensifier Disc?
- All: Yes.
- Benkitnorf: Turn the controls 18 degrees to the left?
- All: Did that.
- Benkitnorf: Are you in Europe? Do you need an adapter?
- All: No.
- Benkitnorf: Well, look. I don't know anything about this thing. Maybe this does something...
- [pushes button, zapping Servo again]
- Benkitnorf: Oops. That didn't work. Okay, well I'll be sure to tell Exeter to give you a call! Bye!
- Exeter: They're concentrating all their attention on Metaluna. Those flashes of light - they're meteors. Hundreds of them! The intense heat is turning Metaluna into a radioactive sun. The temperature must be thousands of degrees by now.
- Crow T. Robot: Cooler by the lake.
- Exeter: A lifeless planet. And yet...
- Tom Servo: Rents are reasonable!
- Exeter: Yet, still serving a useful purpose, I hope. Yes... a sun, warming the surface of some other world - giving light to those who may need it.
- Mike: "Still, your whole family died. That's a bummer, huh?"
- Cal Meecham: [Struggling with the controls of his jet] I have no control...
- Mike: I keep eating and eating.
- Mike Nelson: [as the Universal-International Presents credit comes up] Doesn't the fact that it's universal make it international?
- [alien spaceship catches plane in tractor beam]
- Mike Nelson: I'm beginning to think they're not from around here.
- Tom Servo: No, I bet you they're English, or Canadian.
- Plane Voice: Please be seated, Dr. Meechum. And welcome aboard.
- Mike Nelson: [imitating the Plane Voice] You're being kidnapped by The Light FM!
- Cal Meecham: [reading from the iterociter handbook] Iterociter incorporating planetary generator. Iterociter with voltarator. With astroscope.
- Mike Nelson: [as Cal turns the book sideways] Saaaay, Miss Interociter!
- Mike: Crow!
- Crow T. Robot: [stops swinging pick-axe] Huh?
- Mike: Crow, listen, you've gotta stop!
- Crow T. Robot: Oh, hi, Mike! I've found the perfect spot. Once I've breached through this wall we'll tunnel our way right back to Earth. URG!
- [returns to swinging pick-axe]
- Crow T. Robot: Crow, you big dope! You can't tunnel through space.
- Crow T. Robot: [British accent] Come, come, boy. We must confound Gerry at every turn!
- Crow T. Robot: Man, the universe is really cruisin'.
- Tom Servo: Hey, look, there's Taurus the bull.
- Mike: And right underneath him the constellation feces.
- Crow T. Robot: Hey, look, Orion's broke.
- Crow T. Robot: [as ship descends into fantastic Metaluna landscape] Looks like Dr. Seuss designed their planet!
- Tom Servo: Oh, they're flying into a Roger Dean album cover.
- Crow T. Robot: They're very into "Yes" on this planet.
- Tom Servo: Hee hee!
- Mike: International flights always get the gate furthest from the terminal.
- Tom Servo: Remember, we're parked in the "Denubrian Slime Devil" lot!