Uma Thurman credited as playing...
Noelle
- Dr. Abby Barnes: If I was a guy, I think women would, like, line up to go out with me. I'm smart. I have a good sense of humor. I make a great living.
- Noelle: I'd fuck you.
- Dr. Abby Barnes: Thank you, honey. I know you would.
- Noelle: You and I combined make the perfect woman
- Dr. Abby Barnes: No. You and I combined make the perfect political prisoner. What we really do well is act self-righteous and starve.
- Noelle: Did you ever look in the mirror so long that your face didn't make sense anymore? It just becomes all these shapes. Just shapes. Not good or bad.
- Noelle: Disappointment doesn't kill.
- Dr. Abby Barnes: Right... rejection kills. Disappointment only maims.
- [contemplating how to reveal Abby's true identity to Brian]
- Noelle: Is your show on today?
- Dr. Abby Barnes: Yeah.
- Noelle: I'll go to his house and I'll turn on the radio.
- Dr. Abby Barnes: And?
- Noelle: Have you ever noticed how Superman and Clark Kent are never in the same room at the same time?
- Noelle: You gotta have a boyfriend, don't you? Otherwise it's just you and a cat and before you know, 40 candles on your birthday cake.