Jami Gertz credited as playing...
Dr. Melissa Reeves
- Joey: [Discussing at Meg's on the tornadoes they have seen so far at Meg's home at her dining table, eating steak and eggs] No, that was a good size twister. What was it, an F3?
- Bill: Solid F2.
- Melissa: See, now you have lost me again.
- Bill: It's the Fujita scale. It measures a tornado's intensity by how much it eats.
- Melissa: Eats?
- Bill: Destroys.
- Laurence: That one we encountered back there was a strong F2, possibly an F3.
- Beltzer: Maybe we'll see some 4's.
- Haynes: That would be sweet!
- Bill: 4 is good. 4 will relocate your house very efficiently.
- Melissa: Is there an F5?
- [Everyone goes dead silent]
- Melissa: What would that be like?
- Jason 'Preacher' Rowe: The Finger of God.
- Melissa: None of you has ever seen an F5?
- Bill: ...Just one of us.
- [Looks upstairs, indicating Jo]
- Melissa: [at Meg's home at her dining table, eating steak and eggs] Why do you call Billy "The Extreme?"
- Dusty: Because Billy *is* "The Extreme."
- Jason 'Preacher' Rowe: Bill is the most outta control son of a bitch in the game!
- Bill: [looking at Jo] No, I think I came in second.
- Dusty: So we get this one near Daleton, right?
- Rabbit: Oh, God.
- Jo: You guys have got to get some new stories. I'm gonna go wash up.
- Dusty: And we are way too close. And Jo's got the vid on it right, she's filming it. And all of the sudden outta nowhere, this shitty lookin' green Valiant comes pulling up right in the way.
- Beltzer: [points to Bill] And this loser stumbles out of the car, he's got like a bottle of Jack Daniel's in his hand...
- Dusty: He's naked!
- Rabbit: He is *butt* naked!
- Beltzer: Naked!
- Bill: NOT naked! I was NOT naked!
- Beltzer: [whispering & laughing in Melissa's ear] He was without apparel.
- Bill: Half naked.
- Dusty: Naked. Ok, so Jo's yelling at him to get out of the way, right?
- [all laugh]
- Dusty: And he just strolls up to the twister, says 'have a drink', and he chucks the bottle into the twister, and it NEVER hits the ground.
- Jason 'Preacher' Rowe: The twister caught it, and sucked it right up!
- Bill: [directing towards Melissa] Honey, this is a tissue of lies. See, there was another Bill, an evil Bill, and I killed him.
- Bill: [after the tornado pass by them at the drive in movie theater] Honey, it's Meg. I gotta go.
- Melissa: I'm going back.
- Bill: Good, good, you'll be safe at the motel. I'll see you in the morning.
- Melissa: I won't be there.
- Bill: What? Why? What are you saying?
- Melissa: I'm saying goodbye.
- Bill: No...
- Melissa: You know what? I can't compete with this. I don't even know where to start.
- Bill: Wait, don't do this now, please.
- Melissa: Sooner or later it would have ended, we both know that. The funny thing is... I'm not that upset. What does that mean?
- Bill: I never meant for any of this to happen,
- Melissa: Oh Billy, I know. It's okay. You go ahead. She needs you. I hope that Aunt Meg's okay.
- Bill: What about you?
- Melissa: Oh, don't worry about me. I know my way home.
- [crying with fright after a pair of tornadoes spun their truck around a few times]
- Melissa: When you used to tell me that you chase tornadoes, deep down I always just thought it was a metaphor.
- [talking to a psychiatric patient on the phone]
- Melissa: She did not marry your penis... Okay, alright, she didn't only marry your penis.
- [Jo is salvaging belongings from her crashed truck and looking at Bill's new truck]
- Jo: You got full coverage on that truck?
- Bill: Liability only.
- Jo: [thoughtfully] Liability only...
- Jo: It's a very pretty truck.
- Melissa: [smiling] Thank you.
- Bill: Don't even think about it.
- [Jo keeps cleaning out her truck]
- Bill: No way.
- Melissa: [after seeing DOROTHY for the first time on the back of Jo's truck] Wow, it is great... what is it?