Alan Arkin credited as playing...
Dr. Oatman
- Dr. Oatman: Don't kill anybody for a few days. See what it feels like.
- Martin Q. Blank: All right, I'll give it a shot.
- Dr. Oatman: No, don't give it a shot! Don't shoot anything!
- Martin Q. Blank: Don't you think that maybe you're just upset because I told you what I do for a living, and you got upset and *you're* letting it interfere with *our* dynamic?
- Dr. Oatman: Whoa. Martin. You didn't tell me what you did for a living...
- Martin Q. Blank: Yes, I did!
- Dr. Oatman: You didn't tell me what you did for a living for *four* sessions. *Then* you told me. And I said, "I don't want to work with you any more." And yet, you come back each week at the same time. That's a difficulty for me. On top of that, if you've committed a crime or you're thinking about committing a crime, I have to tell the authorities.
- Martin Q. Blank: I know the law, okay? But I don't want to be withholding; I'm very serious about this process.
- [pause]
- Martin Q. Blank: And I know where you live.
- Dr. Oatman: Oh, now see? That wasn't a nice thing to say; that wasn't designed to make me feel good. That's a... kind of a... not too subtle intimidation, and I, uh, get filled with anxiety when you talk about something like that.
- Martin Q. Blank: Come on, come on. I was just kidding, all right? The thought never crossed my mind.
- Dr. Oatman: You did think of it, Martin! You thought it, and then you said it. And now, I'm left with the aftermath of that, thinking I gotta be creative in a really interesting way or Martin's gonna blow my brains out! You're holding me hostage. That's not right.
- Dr. Oatman: Martin, I'm emotionally involved with you.
- Marty: How are you emotionally involved with me?
- Dr. Oatman: I'm afraid of you.
- Marty: You're afraid of me.
- Dr. Oatman: And that constitutes an emotional involvement, and it would be unethical for me to work with you under those circumstances.
- Marty: Oatman? Don't hang up. Listen, I didn't kill anyone - except some guy tried to kill me, so if I see that guy again, I'm definitely gonna kill him, but I'm not going to kill anybody else. I'm on my way to the reunion now with Debi, but I'm just a little nervous, and I'd like to do a phoner.
- Dr. Oatman: OK, repeat after me. "I am at home with the me. I am rooted in the me who is on this adventure."
- Marty: I am at home with the me, I am rooted in the me who is on this adventure.
- Dr. Oatman: Good. Now take a deep breath, and realize that this is me breathing.
- Marty: Wait, I'm confused. Do you want me to say it or do you want me to realize it?
- Dr. Oatman: What?
- Marty: About the breathing.
- Dr. Oatman: Say it.
- Marty: This is me breathing.
- Dr. Oatman: Good, now keep doing that for about twenty minutes.
- Marty: Listen, I got to go.
- Dr. Oatman: OK. Keep it up. Don't kill anybody.
- Marty: Right!
- [Hangs up]
- Dr. Oatman: We can talk about dreams. It's your nickel.
- Marty: Sure. I had another one about Debi.
- Dr. Oatman: That girl you're obsessed with?
- Marty: Don't you think "obsessed" is a strong word?
- Dr. Oatman: Recurring dreams of loss and pain for 10 years featuring the same person? Yeah, maybe it's a bit obsessive.
- Steve: If we observe the subject in an illegal act, only then can we intervene and terminate.
- Dr. Oatman: Yeah.
- Mr. Grocer: Why don't you just go and shoot the fucker, huh?
- Steve: Because we are not assassins, Mr. Grocer. We work for the American government.