Greetings And Salutations, and welcome to my review of Kickboxing Academy; here's the breakdown of my ratings:
Story: 0.25
Direction: 0.25
Pace: 0.50
Acting: 0.75
Enjoyment: 0.50
TOTAL: 2.25 out of 10.00
In the movie business, there are a lot of bandwagons to jump on, and the writers and director of this flick decided to try tethering their horse to the Martial Arts wagon. Not only did they come untethered, but the wheels on their wagon fell off, and for good measure, the horse mule-kicked them in the nethers.
The story's been told many times before, though I cannot remember one worse than Kickboxing Academy. Here's the premise, let's see if it sounds familiar? One group of martial artists deign their team is better than the group across the road. The one across the way believes they are better than the others, who are just bullies. So a contest is set up to demonstrate which of the teams is the best. The winner stays, and the loser leaves. With a simple plot like this, you need to fill the story with honest, relatable, and plausible characters and scenarios. Though the writers try, they miss the mark every time. However, one thing did make me grin. It was the wild west attitude to the heroes and villains. The good guys wear white and the bad guys wear plaid - no they don't, they wear black - Dead Men Wear Plaid, now that's a great film to watch for a laugh.
Sadly, when filmed, due to the director's inexperience, it gets worse and not better. There's not too much I can say. For the most part, the story is shot in the standard point and shoot style at a steady pace. There's not much thought given to composition, except for the end sequence where the bad guy of the picture goes nuts - This is framed pretty well. Shame he waited until the end to get creative. All of the fight sequences could have used quicker cuts and engaging camera angles because the choreography is average and needed umph to add the excitement you should be feeling. If the action bores you, then something is wrong.
Only two of the cast appear to try - Donna Barnes as the Good Sensai, June, and Tom Scalise as Bad Sensai, Maddox. Barnes is more than passible as the teacher and adds a nice softness to her character. Whereas Scalise falls into the Hammy method of over-acting, and because Academy is a comedy, it works pretty well - though it is too reminiscent of GW Bailey as Harris in the Police Academy films, maybe this is what they wanted. The rest range from average to downright terrible - Steven Bauer, who stumbles through his sense with little sense of direction.
I cannot, in all good faith recommend this film to anyone. I don't mind the Comedy fans laughing at me, but I don't want the Martial Art fanatics coming around to show me what real kickboxing looks and feels like. Keep a good round-house kick's distance from this dull travesty.
Please feel free to visit my Holding Out For A Hero and Just For Laughs lists to see where I ranked Kickboxing Academy.
Take Care & Stay Well.
