Ken Osmond credited as playing...
Eddie Sr.
- Eddie Sr.: So, your first boy-girl party. Let me take this opportunity to impart upon you a little wisdom culled from years of experience in the field.
- Eddie Haskell Jr.: That's very generous of you, Dad.
- Eddie Sr.: Boys, women are all a bunch of bloodsuckers, out to get you any way they can. And when they finally succeed in breaking your spirit, they'll flush you like a dead goldfish.