Townies

Stark, low-budget sideshow of freaks set in the fictional town of Schlarb, Ohio. Right from the opening shot we are introduced to Dickie, Pricey, Crazy Connie, William, The Clapper, The Licker, and Caduceus: seven outlandish and very unique individuals whose misadventures immediately become the premise of the film. I found this gritty production to be oddly funny, extraordinarily absorbing, and curiously heartwarming. Harold's non-judgmental depictions of the characters, both the good and bad ones, were one of the many enjoyable aspects. This is from the same man who brought us the "Killer Nerd" movies, which were good but not as complex as this.

Townies is the laziest movie I have ever seen, and I saw the Blair Witch movies (parts one and two). It seems confused in what it wants to be. It's not funny enough for comedy, it's not tragic enough for drama, it's not bloody enough for horror, and it's not good enough for watching. It has scenes of a man doing "slapstick/bloody" karate so I think, oh this movie will be in the vein of Toxic Avenger and Street Trash. Then it leaps without warning into a drama about a missing girl, a retarded (mentally handicap) woman and a trusting mother. Then it slaps itself into the ONLY good part in the movie which seems to be set up like a sitcom without the laugh tracks. The part I'm speaking of is a lonely TOWNIE who is so lonely he finds comfort in a rotting corpse. That was the ONLY part of the movie that gave me ANY feeling. The rest was a waist of my life. Then, just to show how CRUEL Wayne is there is a kind of DOCUMENTARY at the end of the film of Wayne (the Director) making fun of Toby (the star) in public. It made me sick. Even though Killer Nerd and Bride of Killer Nerd (two other movies by Wayne) aren't the best, they at least are thought out enough were you can stay entertained until the ending credits. I even like Killer Nerd a bit, it had some great lines I still use to this day.

If you like underground films, if you like overground films, and if you like to watch your feet, just resting were they are, you will not like TOWNIES!

*1/2 (out of ****)

The film opens with a warning from star Toby Radloff like the one in James Whale's FRANKENSTEIN and even includes an intermission with a "courtesy flush."

This film is a journey into a real zone of twilight, a surreal exploration of the mind and strangeness. Radloff, star of KILLER NERD and BRIDE OF KILLER NERD, plays one of his strangest characters yet -- Dickie, the necrophiliac explorer of trash.

Just remember, if you dare to watch, that, as we are told at the end, "the squirrels were really dead." Warning: the film ends with an unsolved mystery which means that there could be a sequel. In other words, the saga of Schlarb, Ohio, has just begun.

Townies is not a movie that is easily fitted into any particular genre. It's not a comedy. It's not a drama. It's not a horror film. Yet there are elements in it that are comedic, dramatic, and horrifying. And I for one like a movie that does that. As my idol Lloyd Kaufman often says: "Why are we so limited in the emotions we can arouse with movies? We can make you laugh, or we can make you cry. Why can't we make you cringe, or groan with displeasure?" While not an exact quote, it does summarize perfectly what I feel about Townies. Townies will make you laugh. Townies will make you cry. But Townies will also make you cringe and groan with displeasure. But if you're up for the adventure, it is well worth it. If you come in expecting ONLY to laugh or ONLY to cry, and to NOT cringe or groan with displeasure, don't waste your time. I for one am going to go watch it again. And you're welcome to join me.

I can't believe I wasted my time with this movie. I couldn't even call it a movie. It was so bad with nothing to recommend it.

I like low budget movies and weird flicks but this one had me bored to death. Badly made and bad acting ruined it from being curious. You have to wonder what these people were thinking when they spent money to produce this movie. I wonder what I was thinking watching it to the end. I recommend this movie to no one. How did they release this? Was there an audience who likes this kind of movie? There must be because you can find this at almost any video store. But why?

Deserves to be forgotten.

If you like bad movies then this is for you.