David Alan Grier credited as playing...
Charlie Johnson
- Joe Dayton: So, Charlie, what do you do?
- Charlie Johnson: I'm a vet.
- Joe Dayton: Oh.
- [beat]
- Joe Dayton: I didn't go to 'Nam.
- Charlie Johnson: Come on, let's go get a beer.
- Bob Rueland: No thanks.
- Charlie Johnson: Well, if not tonight, Friday night, because I have someone for you.
- Bob Rueland: No, Charlie, no.
- Charlie Johnson: Come on, she's smart, she has a great body, intelligent, great body... You gotta start going out! She's really great, her cat was a patient of mine!
- Bob Rueland: I'm a dog person.
- Shari: Ok. I'm doing this new food combination so I don't really need something...
- Grace Briggs: We have some specials this evening. The Chicken Vesuvio...
- Charlie Johnson: Please! I'm around them all day. I didn't mean... It was... I'm a vet.
- Grace Briggs: ...and a corn beef and cabbage souffle and a spinach ravioli in arrabiatta sauce which is my favorite.
- Bob Rueland: I'll have that.
- Marsha: That sounds so fattening.
- Bob Rueland: Well, just order something else.
- Marsha: Well, is every dish here cooked in oil?
- Grace Briggs: No, some we boil in Swiss water.
- Grace Briggs: Good evening.
- Marsha: Oh, no no no no no no no. Do you have bottled water?
- Grace Briggs: Sure. Anyone else?
- Charlie Johnson: May I have a wine list please?
- Grace Briggs: Sure.
- Bob Rueland: Do we know each other?
- Grace Briggs: Uh, I think so. You been in here before?
- Bob Rueland: No, I think I'd remember an Irish-Italian restaurant.
- Grace Briggs: Uh, yeah. You would.
- Marsha: Oh, my gah. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. My water? I don't want a Swiss water. I got sick on an imported Swiss water once. Do you remember that night?
- Shari: Oh, that was awful.
- Charlie Johnson: You were there?
- Marsha: Do you remember that? Horrible! As long as it's not Swiss or tap water, it'll be fine. Preferably French, no bubbles. I want it cold. No ice, no glass. Just a bottle and a straw. Do you want to write it down? I don't want Swiss water. I got sick once.
- Shari: It was really bad.
- Grace Briggs: I'm pretty sure I got it.
- Bob Rueland: I'm sorry. Can I get a cup of coffee?
- Grace Briggs: Sure.
- Bob Rueland: No straw.