Christopher Rodriguez Marquette credited as playing...
Eli
- Mrs. Kidman: Eli, do those girls go to your school?
- Eli: Actually, no, Mrs. Kidman, they're porn stars.
- Eli: Dude, don't mess this up.
- Matthew: Mess what up?
- Eli: Matt, she's a porn star! Okay? Take her to a motel room and bang her like a beast!
- Matthew: Eli, I like this girl.
- Eli: And you can still like her with your penis inside her. Matthew, I tell you that you're going to regret this. What would JFK do? You know he'd tap that ass.
- Matthew: Eli, I'm never going to see her again.
- Eli: Oh, you know what? Fine!
- Matthew: Fine!
- Eli: Fine!
- [pause during scene change]
- Eli: Goddammit Matt! I swear to God if you don't fuck her, I'll kill myself! Matt! Please! Please, Matt! Fuck her for me! For me!
- [at Q&A with Eli at a college school]
- Film School Student: Why'd you skip film school? Don't you think you're a little young?
- Eli: SHUT THE FUCK UP! Next question.